


i've finally found you

by bbydelrey



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Drama, F/F, High School AU, Hurt/Comfort, I’ll add more tags later, Lesbian AU, Underage Drinking, already posting this on wattpad, background Scyvie, background craquaria, mentions of drug use, shitty parents, some smut, they're both bisexual, tw anxiety but not explicit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-05-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:47:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 33,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23687155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bbydelrey/pseuds/bbydelrey
Summary: no one even knows hard life wasi don't even think about it now becausei've finally found you- radio, lana del rey///lowercase intended, cis girl au, high school au
Relationships: Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo
Comments: 16
Kudos: 23





	1. prologue

**Author's Note:**

> hey everybody so here's the thing, i've been posting this fanfiction on wattpad since around april last year and although i haven't made a ton of chapters i really want to start writing more. i've never posted on here before but i've decided that i want to post both on here and on wattpad because like why not? i've posted a few fics on wattpad and they've done kinda well so if you want to go check them out my name is @ chloexdelano over on there, or who knows i might start posting them over on here too. i just wanted a change i guess and so that's why i've decided to begin posting this on ao3.
> 
> anyways, i hope you all enjoy. feedback is always appreciated :)
> 
> also just as a side note this first chapter is only a preview so the coming chapters will be much longer. i'm going to post the chapters that have already been posted on wattpad over the next few days.
> 
> \- chloe

vanessa's life seemed to be falling apart - her mom was working most hours of the day since her dad had left. she needed to provide for them, since vanessa's dad couldn't.

besides from that she had her friends which were great and she was popular, she didn't really struggle with school. sure she wasn't the smartest student there but she didn't mind.

she went to lots of parties, most boys wanted to date her and some girls too, she spent a lot of time with her friends, getting high or getting drunk or just hanging out, and she got on well with pretty much everybody.

but for some reason she still felt alone.

she tried kissing cute boys and girls, hooking up with people, she even tried dating but it still didn't work. so instead, she turned to alcohol and weed, and of course that didn't work either. it dulled the pain for a little while, but that familiar lonely feeling always came back.

and she didn't know what she missing, she didn't know what could cure her loneliness. she couldn't help but wonder if this was how things were meant to be for her.

///

brooke belonged to a pretty normal family. she had her mom, her dad and her older brother austin. her parents had decent jobs and they brought in a good amount of money.

but they were strict and old fashioned and religious - they had always taught brooke that any relationship, other than between a man and woman, was wrong.

so it's fair to say that when she came out to her family as bisexual just under a month ago, they weren't exactly pleased.

brooke had lived in canada for all of her life, until she was almost 17 and had to move to california for her dad's new job.

she loved canada but she didn't mind leaving the country behind since she knew that there must be some good in this new chapter in her life.

sure, she was leaving her friends, and most of her extended family, behind but she didn't mind. she'd make new friends, she was sure of it.

they moved into their new house in california at the start of february.

and that's when their story began.

_**"it's a frightening thought, that in one fraction of a moment you can fall in the kind of love that takes a lifetime to get over"** _


	2. part one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's the first real chapter everybody <3
> 
> \- chloe

it was monday and vanessa wasn't exactly pleased about the day ahead: school.

she got up and took a quick shower before picking out her outfit for the day. she chose a black denim skirt, and a red strapless crop top, as well as some vans. she did her makeup and popped on her usual fake lashes. she put her hair into a messy bun before throwing on a denim jacket over her outfit, since she was definitely breaking the dress code. she grabbed her bag, which had her school stuff in, before going downstairs and getting into her car and driving off to school.

she arrived there twenty five minutes later, after going to a drive-thru coffee shop for an iced coffee, which she got most mornings - she had to get her energy from something, since she barely ever slept at all.

she was greeted by aquaria as she walked in the school gates.

"hey, how are you, miss vanjie?" aquaria asked, vanjie was a nickname her friends had all given her in freshman year - it was a long story.

"i'm good, sis, how are you?" she said in her usual, loud tone.

"great, thanks, me and bree spent the weekend together so i'm good." aquaria replied.

bree was a nickname for brianna, aquaria's girlfriend.

they carried on talking as they walked to their lockers, which were in the same hallway. when they arrived were greated by vixen and blair.

"hey guys, guess what we heard?" blair seemed very happy, just like always.

"what?" aquaria questioned.

"there's a new girl coming to our school." vixen told them.

"when does she start?" vanessa asked.

"today." blair says with a smile on her face.

"what's she like?" vanessa asked one more question.

"well, we don't really know but she's in the principals office now and we saw her walk in." blair told her.

they carried on talking for a while, and the rest of the group arrived including: monique, brianna, monet, mayhem, nina and a'keria.

they waved their goodbyes as the bell for homeroom went off.

///

vanessa's day went as normal until third period, which was biology. this was when she met the new girl for the first time.

"good morning class, so we have a new student joining us today, would you like to introduce yourself and tell the class a little bit about yourself?" the teacher, mrs anderson, gestured towards the new girl.

"my name is brooke lynn hytes, although most people just call me brooke. i'm from canada and i've lived there all of my life until my family had to move here for my dad's job." _brooke lynn hytes, pretty name_ , vanessa thought to herself.

"okay, brooke, could you take a seat next to..." mrs anderson takes a look at her seating plan, to look for any seats that were available. "vanessa mateo, at the back there."

_oh my fucking god._

vanessa could feel butterflies in her stomach, brooke was gorgeous - there was no denying it.

brooke takes a seat next to vanessa, she couldn't help but admire her and look at her, curiously, for a little while. there was something about her that just drew her in.

mrs anderson began to talk through the lesson and what they would be doing over the next few weeks.

whilst this was going on, brooke decided that it was a good time to get to know the pretty girl she gets to sit next to.

and the perfect moment arises when vanessa looks up, at brooke, for a moment or so.

"hello, love." brooke said quietly to the brunette. "how's your day going?" she asked, making conversation.

"it's going really well, thank you." she paused. "you've made it more interesting than usual, though, baby." there's a different tone in her voice, it's a little flirtatious and direct, she got like that when she found somebody attractive.

"how's that?" brooke questioned, matching vanessa's flirty tone.

"well, you're gorgeous, miss brooke lynn, and you seem like a good person. you have a calming energy about you. i need that in my life." she explained, not breaking eye contact.

"thank you so much, angel."

the teacher finished talking and vanessa gets the boy, on the table next to her, to explain what they had to do. it turned out, they had 20 minutes to answer questions from a textbook.

"so, i was wondering, would you like to sit with me and my friends at lunch?" vanessa asked brooke, turning to her once again.

"yes, i'd love that. thank you."

"of course, anytime, new girl." and she gives her a smile.

///

it was lunch time and brooke was being introduced to all of vanessa's friends. they all seemed to like her, and so far, she liked all of them too.

they were all sat in the cafeteria, brooke was sat across from vanessa, and they were all talking to her about canada and why she moved to california.

during lunch, vanessa could not help but smile, this new girl was just so fucking perfect and she hoped they'd become good friends.

///

the end of the day rolled around and vanessa was walking to her locker, when a certain blonde, tapped her on the shoulder.

"hey, vanessa." it was brooke.

"hey, how's your first day been?" vanessa spoke, a lot happier than usual, and with a huge smile on her face.

"it's been good, actually, although i am fucking exhausted." brooke sounded happy too.

they talked until vanessa got to her locker and brooke gave her a hug. she wrapped her arms around the shorter girl's shoulders, breathing in her scent. vanessa placed her hands, gently, on her waist, pulling her slightly closer.

"i'll see you tomorrow, love." brooke said as she pulled away.

"goodbye, miss brooke lynn."

///

brooke arrived home at 3:40. she had to take the bus, which took longer, since her car was still getting transported from canada.

she went upstairs into her bedroom, she heard the door open and close again; it would have been her brother, austin. she took off her jacket and her shoes and lay down on her bed for five minutes, thinking about her first day.

she thought about all the new people she had met and the classes she had and the teachers but her mind wandered off to one girl in particular: vanessa mateo. _she was fucking perfect_. she couldn't get over that girl, her face, her brown eyes, her outfit, her voice, her smile, her laugh, _god damn that fucking laugh_. brooke lynn smiled to herself thinking about her.

///

vanessa got home fifteen minutes after she left school. it was needless to say that miss brooke lynn hytes had not left her mind. she was gorgeous and charismatic and kind. and she had this gut feeling that she was going to mean a lot to her someday, and that terrified her.

**_"our eyes met and suddenly i forgot how to breathe"_ **


	3. part two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here is part two <3
> 
> thank u so much for the kudos, i hope you all are enjoying it. leave a comment if you like, i would really appreciate it.
> 
> also, this was written like a little over a year ago, so i promise it does get better. i feel like my writing has kinda (?) gotten better since then so yeah the more recent chapters will probably be u know better. how many times do i have to say better? 
> 
> anyways hope u enjoy :)
> 
> \- chloe

it was brooke's second week in california and her, brianna, aquaria, nina and vanessa were headed to taco bell after school on wednesday.

"just so you know, brooke, vanessa is possibly one of the worst drivers i've ever seen. so you've been warned." brianna said.

"i'm not that bad, bitch." vanessa replied, earning a laugh from all of the girls.

she drove them to taco bell and they arrive there twenty minutes later. they all order their food and they sit down at a table.

"so, miss brooke lynn, how are you finding california?" vanessa asked her, before taking a bite out of her burrito.

"i love it, i miss canada a lot, but i'm really happy to be here." she answered her question.

their conversation continued, they all talk for a while, giggling whenever somebody said something funny or stupid.

and at some point during their time at taco bell, vanessa zoned out and can't help but just admire brooke. she's sat across from her, and every time she smiles or laughs or messes with her hair, vanessa's heart just melts and she gets butterflies in her stomach. maybe she had a crush on her.

///

it was the next day and everybody was sat in the cafeteria. brooke couldn't keep her eyes off of vanessa, she looked so cute in her pink dress and with her long brown hair falling down her back.

"so you like her, huh?" nina whispered to brooke.

"what?" brooke was caught off guard.

"you like vanessa?" nina rephrased.

brooke blushed a little and her face lights up at the mention of her name.

"maybe, fuck." brooke cursed herself. "but look at her, how can you not? she's fucking stunning."

"she gets that a lot." nina told her. "you should ask her out."

vanessa looks over at her, flashing her a beautiful smile, and brooke could have swore she melted inside.

///

it was exactly a week later and brooke was in maths, another class she had with vanessa, the brunette sat in the row in front of her, one seat to the left. vanessa always turned around to talk to brooke in the lesson, even though their teacher, miss olivers, would shout at her for doing so.

"hey, queen of the north, so i was wondering if you'd maybe wanna sleep over at my place tomorrow night, after school?" vanessa asked, once she got brooke's attention.

"haven't you got some party to go to or something?" brooke questioned.

"nope." vanessa replied simply. "so what do you say? monique, vixen and blair will be there too?"

 _so it wouldn't just be the two of them_ , brooke brushed the thought away. _of course it wouldn't just be the two of them._

"yeah, why not?" brooke gave her answer, with a smile.

"yes, bitch! meet me at my locker after seventh period tomorrow, we're taking my car."

"miss mateo, stop turning around!" miss olivers shouted at her.

"sorry, miss." vanessa apologised, even though she wasn't sorry at all.

///

it was friday now and vanessa was driving to a 7/11 with her friends to get some snacks for their sleepover.

they picked out what they wanted before paying and getting into the car for vanessa to drive them to her house.

as they drove, vanessa and her friends sang along to the radio, even though vanessa was definitely the loudest.

they arrived at vanessa's house and brought all of the snacks up to her bedroom. they took off their jackets and shoes and sat down on the floor, all pretty close to one another, since there wasn't a huge amount of space. vanessa sat in between monique and brooke, vixen was next to monique and blair was next to brooke.

they all talked for a little while, laughing and joking about who knows what. gradually vanessa moved closer to brooke, their shoulders touching.

they all decided to put a movie on, they chose mean girls, and they started eating their snacks.

throughout the movie, vanessa would put her head on brooke's shoulder or she would snuggle up to her. brooke loved it, she felt wanted and it was really nice.

they watched a couple more movies before it got to 8pm and they decided it would be a good time to order some pizza.

it arrived 40 minutes later and they stayed sitting on the floor, talking about whatever came in to conversation.

it was now way after 10pm and after eating pizza and watching the latest episode of riverdale they decided to make the night a little more interesting - by playing never have i ever.

vanessa got out a bottle of vodka from downstairs, and five shot glasses, filling each of them up, a little bit too much.

"vanessa, oh my god, that's way too much." brooke giggled at her friend, that girl loved alcohol a little bit too much.

"yeah, but it'll be more fun." vanessa replied with a giggle.

she finished pouring the shots.

"so who wants to go first?" vanessa asked.

"i will." monique volunteered. "never have i ever smoked a cigarette."

brooke took a shot and so did vanessa.

vixen was the next to go. "never have i ever gotten blackout drunk."

vanessa took a shot and so does monique.

then it was blair. "never have i ever smoked weed."

everybody but blair takes a shot.

brooke went next. "never have i ever had sex with somebody more than five years older than me."

vanessa took a shot and so does monique.

"let me think." vanessa paused. "okay, never have i ever had a crush on a friends boyfriend or girlfriend."

brooke took a shot and so do blair and monique.

they do a round or two more and things become a little bit more interesting.

"never have i ever had a crush on a teacher." monique said.

vanessa, brooke and blair all took a shot.

"right, never have i ever been attracted to a woman." vixen said her statement.

"what do you mean by attrac-?" monique didn't even get the chance to finish her sentence.

"wanted to kiss them." vixen said, loudly, sounding a little tipsy.

"oh okay..."

monique, blair, vanessa and brooke all take a shot.

when vanessa saw brooke take a shot, her heart felt warm, she liked girls? she could not believe it, yes, they flirted with each other, that was clear to anybody, but flirty straight girls did that with her all of the time, maybe this was just another one of those cases. but apparently it wasn't and that felt kinda comforting.

"okay, never have i ever slept with somebody of the same sex." blair spoke.

only vanessa and brooke take a shot.

"never have i ever cheated on somebody." brooke said.

monique takes a shot and so does vixen.

"never have i ever been in love." vanessa said.

blair takes a shot and so does brooke.

brooke looks at vanessa, and she just hopes that one day she'll find somebody who loves her because god knows she deserves that.

eventually the game came to an end, and vanessa went down stairs to clean the shot glasses and put the vodka away. brooke followed her down stairs, wanting a moment alone with her.

"hey, angel." brooke says to her.

"hey, what's up?" vanessa asked, as she cleans up.

"i just wanted a moment alone with you." there's a hint of flirtation in her voice.

vanessa tries to stop herself from smiling, but it doesn't work.

"so, you were in love, huh?" vanessa asked, making a conversation between them, she wanted to know more about brooke.

"yeah, i guess. his name was carter and we dated for just over a year. i loved him, a lot too. but we broke up about five months ago." she told her.

"why did you guys break up?" vanessa looked up at her.

"i realised that i liked girls." she said, looking into vanessa's brown eyes.

hearing those words from brooke and seeing the way she looked at her, it made vanessa's heart melt.

they finished cleaning up downstairs and headed upstairs, everybody was already in their pyjamas so they decided to get changed too.

when the two finished getting changed they went on youtube and watched their favourite youtubers including shane dawson, jeffree star and james charles.

whilst they watched their videos, vanessa was cuddled into brooke, the taller girl ran her fingers up and down her arm, holding her close to her. and god, did vanessa not want her to let her go?

it was almost four am, vanessa was almost sober and so was everybody else, but now their lack of sleep was creeping up on them and so they decided to go to bed.

"who's sleeping where tonight?" blair asked.

"me and brooke are having my bed since you bitches slept in it last time. i'll get some blankets and shit for you guys on the floor."

vanessa did what she said she would and soon enough monique, blair and vixen had a comfy place to sleep on the floor.

vanessa and brooke climbed into bed and they were facing each other.

"i've had a really great time tonight." brooke whispered to the other girl.

"me too, i'm glad you came." vanessa gave her a smile.

"same, love. i've learnt a lot about you tonight."

"you have?"

"yeah."

"tell me what you've learnt then, bitch." she whispered, gaining a laugh from brooke.

"nah, i'm not giving that up just yet."

vanessa giggles and so did brooke.

"can i cuddle you?" brooke asked her.

"yeah, i'd love that."

brooke pulls vanessa closer, her hands resting on her waist. their bodies were almost touching and so vanessa buries her head into brooke's neck.

it felt right. fuck it.

"goodnight, my love." brooke spoke.

"goodnight, babe." vanessa responded.

///

they all left vanessa's house at around 2pm the next day. and vanessa couldn't stop thinking about the canadian girl who was making her feel things she hadn't felt before.

she couldn't stop thinking about her smile and her laugh. and they way she looked at her when she told vanessa that she liked girls. and how she held her close as they fell asleep.

never in her life had vanessa felt this way before, she had never felt this happy and at peace, and it was all down to one person: brooke. and she just hoped that she was around for the long run. because she was already getting way too attached to this girl.

_**"it was the way you laughed, i knew i wanted that in my** _ **_life"_ **


	4. part three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another chapter for you all 
> 
> thank u sm for the reads and the kudos that this fic has got so far. i really do appreciate it <3
> 
> \- chloe

monday rolled around and vanessa woke up, slightly happier than usual. she got to see brooke again. ever since brooke had joined the school, she actually looked forward to school. and it made her sick that the blonde had that effect on her.

she took a shower and picked out her outfit, a simple red dress, a denim jacket and some vans. she did her makeup and curled her hair, grabbed her bag and drove to school, of course getting her daily starbucks on the way there.

she arrived at school and walked to her locker, where she saw brooke.

"hey, baby." the taller girl pulled vanessa into a hug.

"hey, _mi amor_." her puerto rican accent coming out a little more than usual.

"oh my god, spanish sounds so fucking hot, coming out of your mouth." brooke says as she pulled away from the hug.

" _muchísimas gracias_ , _cariño_." she continued, whispering it into her ear, wanting to rub it in.

brooke couldn't believe her, vanessa speaking spanish just did something to her. and it didn't help that she looked so fucking good too.

they carried on talking as vanessa got her books for first period, they were then joined by their friends.

"hey, guys." monet greeted them.

"hey." vanessa and brooke said in sync.

"vanessa, can i just steal you for a moment?" aquaria asked, grabbing on to her friends arm.

"yeah, i guess." they both giggle as the pulled her away.

they go to another hallway before they sat down on a couch.

"soooo, i have something to tell you, but you have to tell me something in return." aquaria stated.

"okay?" she said, but it came out more like a question.

"so, me and bree were hanging out friday, right, which is why i couldn't come to your sleepover, and guess what?"

"what?"

"so, you know how we haven't said i love you yet because we're both fucking terrified? well, on friday, we had sex, and i don't know what happened but she told me that she loved me and i said it back. vanessa, i fucking love her, she's my entire world." she had a huge smile on her face.

"oh my god, that's great, congrats." vanessa gave her a hug and aquaria hugged back. "i'm so happy for you guys."

"thank you, i was so scared to say those words to her, even know i knew how i felt, but when they came out it felt right. i'm just so happy."

they talked for a minute more.

"so, what did you wanna know?" vanessa asked.

"so, i'm just asking because i've never seen you this happy in your entire life and i've known you since kindergarten, nessa." she started. "do you like brooke? like, do you have a crush on her?" she saw vanessa tense up a little. "look, you don't have to tell me, it's totally cool. but i've just never seen you this happy before and it's always when brooke is around or she's mentioned. look, i promise i won't tell her if you do. i just wanna know because i want you to be able to come to me to talk about her, because you were always there for me when i needed to talk about brianna." she explained.

vanessa didn't say anything in response for a few moments. for once, she didn't know what to say.

of course she liked her, it was hard not too: her gorgeous smile, how kind she was, the way she made vanessa feel, how she'd always hug her and call her cute nicknames. yes, maybe she did like her.

"i don't know," she paused. "i mean i guess, the way i feel around her - i don't feel like that around anybody else."

"vanessa, you like her!" aquaria said, loudly.

"shhh!"

"sorry."

"but you're right, i can't help it, she just makes me feel things i don't feel with anyone." she had a small smile on her face, even though she was trying so hard to not let it show.

just as that conversation ended, brooke and brianna walk around the corner.

"hey baby!" brianna says, walking over to aquaria, sitting down on her lap.

they kiss, and vanessa can't help but imagine kissing brooke.

"come to the bathroom with me, vanessa?" brooke asked.

"mhmm." vanessa nodded, standing up from the couch, shaking her previous thoughts away.

they walk to the nearest bathroom, which is completely empty.

"so, what did i miss when i was with aquaria?" vanessa asked.

brooke goes in to a stall but they continue talking, whilst vanessa looks in the mirror, fixing her hair.

"we were all just talking about our weekends, but you wanna know something, blair seems a little bit off with me, i don't know what it is."

"really how come?"

"i don't know, girl, but she kept looking at me and she seemed pissed."

"why? you haven't done anything wrong!" vanessa gets a little defensive over her, and brooke can't help but smile to herself.

"no idea."

the toilet flushes and brooke comes out and washes her hands and dries them.

they leave the bathroom, still talking and go off to homeroom as the bell rings, saying goodbye to one another.

///

it was now lunch time and they were all sat on the field since it was warm out.

vanessa was sat next to brooke, as usual, and everybody was engrossed in a conversation, that vanessa wasn't really listening to.

brooke could tell she wasn't listening so she quietly got her attention.

"hey, what's up?" brooke asked, in a soft voice, grabbing her hand gently.

"oh nothing." vanessa put on a smile.

"come on, what is it?" she squeezed her hand.

"i wanna know blair's fucking problem." she said, quietly, trying to not draw any attention to their conversation.

"don't stress over it, it's not worth it." brooke said with a reassuring smile.

and vanessa couldn't help but smile too, because brooke was gorgeous and her smile just did something to her.

///

it was later on in the week and vanessa and brooke were sat in vanessa's bedroom on the floor, against her bed, about to smoke a blunt.

"god, what am i getting myself into?" brooke asked, but she has a smile on her face, she's happy to be alone with vanessa.

"stop, this is gonna be fun."

vanessa lights the blunt before taking a hit and handing it to brooke.

four hours pass, they've smoked another blunt or two and and they're both _very_ high. in that time they talk about everything imaginable; their families, what they want to do in life, conspiracy theories, tv shows, brooke's life in canada, just everything.

they got to know each other extremely well over those few hours, they had formed this bond and they now just understood each other. and it was so beautiful, because they weren't the kind of people to just bare their souls to _anybody_ \- but they trusted each other a lot, enough to show each other their souls.

**_"sometimes you can't explain what you see in a person. it's just the way they take you to a place no else can"_ **


	5. part four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello everyone! i’m gonna keep posting the already written chapters over the next few days so expect quite a few updates :)
> 
> \- chloe

over the next week or so, brooke and vanessa grew unbelievably close; they were texting every day and spending time with one another after school, and they were just enjoying getting to know each other.

and every day that passed brooke's feelings for vanessa only got stronger. she was starting to _really_ like vanessa, and something in her knew that it wasn't just some silly crush, that it was something more.

vanessa liked brooke too, and she liked her _a lot_. but it had gotten to the point now where it wasn't just attraction or a crush - it was something else entirely. and she hated it, because vanessa didn't do _feelings._

///

it was wednesday, and over lunchtime a'keria noticed a certain type of energy between brooke and vanessa - how vanessa would sit right next to brooke, and the way brooke would look at vanessa. she could tell that there was something there, that they liked each other, and so she took it upon herself to try and get the truth out of vanessa. she needed to know what was going on between them, or how she felt towards brooke.

it was the lesson after lunch and a'keria was sat next to vanessa in english. they had a substitute teacher, and she wasn't paying attention to the fact that nobody was doing their work, so a'keria decided that now would be a good time to try and get _something_ out of vanessa.

"so, girl, tell me what's going on with you and brooke?" a'keria asked, straight to the point.

"what?" vanessa was lost, yes she always flirted with brooke, and they were very close, but absolutely nothing was going on between them, and nothing _would_ ever happen between them.

"oh come on, i see the way you look at her." a'keria softened her tone a little. "you like her."

vanessa doesn't say anything. she had already told aquaria that she liked brooke, and it killed her, because she wanted to keep her crush, or what she thought was just a crush, to herself.

but maybe there wouldn't be any harm in just one more person knowing that she liked brooke. surely, it wouldn't make a difference.

"yeah, you're right, i do." she said, slowly, not wanting to say too much.

"why are you holding back?" a'keria wasn't used to seeing her friend so quiet, that shit never happened.

"i don't know, i just don't do this ever."

"do what?"

"feelings." vanessa told her simply, and she took a pause for a moment or two. "but, god, i just can't help how i feel about her."

a'keria smiled to herself, she had never seen vanessa this way before - all shy over somebody. she could tell that brooke meant a lot to her, and it warmed her heart.

"i'm just gonna be honest with you." a'keria said seriously. "i see ya'll flirting all of the time, and i see the looks, and all of that. and, i really do think she feels the same way. if that's what you're worried about, her not liking you back, then you're crazy, because i see the way she looks at you, and it's not the way you'd look at a friend."

vanessa didn't reply, she was too busy thinking, taking in what a'keria had been saying.

"look, i know it's none of my business but i care about you. and these past few weeks, you've been different and you seem happy. and i really think that's because of brooke." a'keria continued. 

"i don't know, maybe." vanessa wasn't saying much, she didn't know what to say.

"vanessa, you need to tell her if you like her, because she feels the same way and she deserves to know."

"i know." vanessa nodded.

and the conversation ends.

///

a couple of weeks go by, and it was thursday, and brooke and vanessa were in biology. their teacher wasn't in, so they had a substitute, and she didn't seem to care about telling the class what work they should complete. so vanessa took this god sent time to talk to brooke, possibly one of her favourite people.

"so, monique's holding a party tomorrow night, with just the girls, we're all gonna smoke some weed, are you coming?" vanessa asked.

"yeah, i'd love to, but would it be okay if i stayed at your place after because my parents would kill me if they found out i was smoking weed?"

"of course you can, we can't have you getting into trouble, miss brooke lynn." vanessa was so fucking happy that she'd be spending the night with her.

brooke laughed at her last comment, before pulling her into a side hug, as if to say 'thank you'.

their conversation continued, laughing and joking with one another, until the end of the lesson.

///

friday rolled around and brooke was getting ready with vanessa for the party.

"brooke, i don't what the fuck to wear." vanessa whined, looking into her closet.

"wear red, it's your colour, it looks good on you." brooke said with a smile, and vanessa couldn't help but blush.

she picked out a red two piece, a long sleeved cropped top and a short skirt, she also chose some red strappy heels.

brooke was wearing a long sleeved black dress, it went down to her mid thigh and it had a split up one of the sides, which showed off her long legs. she also put on some black heels.

they finished changing, took a couple of shots and got started on their makeup.

"you look so fucking hot." vanessa complimented the blonde, as she did her foundation.

"thank you, so do you, baby, as usual." vanessa's heart felt warm, it always did when she was around brooke.

they finished their makeup an hour and half later, they took longer than they would by themselves, because they were talking and singing along to music, that was playing on vanessa's phone, and it was nearing 7pm, which meant they should probably leave for monique's party.

they took brooke's car, it had arrived from canada over a week ago. yes, they knew it was dangerous, because they had taken a couple of shots, but it took a lot for brooke to get drunk, or even tipsy, so vanessa trusted her.

///

they got to the party and everybody was already there.

everybody was sat in monique's living room on the floor, in a somewhat circle. they were all passing around the weed bong, and they each took a hit from it.

an hour or so in, some people were higher than others, since they had smoked more. blair decided to smoke some weed this time, she always turned it down before, but she was feeling pretty brave tonight, it turned out.

it was about 8:30pm and monique decided it would be a good idea to play a game of truth - it was basically truth or dare, just minus the dare.

"okay, everyone remembers the rules? you can ask anyone anything, once you've answered your question." monique explained.

everybody nodded.

"i'll go first." vixen offered, before proceeding to ask her question.

about 30 minutes into the game things began getting interesting.

"okay, vanessa, what do you think about brooke?" vixen asked, as if she already had opinions on what vanessa thought.

vanessa's entire body froze, she didn't know what to say. but she was in a flirty mood, and in the moment she didn't care what people were going to say about her answer.

"i think she's gorgeous and cute. she's just so fucking kind too, she's amazing." vanessa said, she was kinda nervous, she always got like that when it came to brooke.

brooke was kinda shocked, yes vanessa flirted with her a lot, but vanessa was just a flirtatious kind of person. hearing those words, it made her heart feel warm.

"thank you, my love." brooke smiles at her, grabbing her hand, since she was sat next to her.

vanessa asked a question to brianna, who asked a question to blair, who asked a question to brooke.

"why do you flirt with vanessa all of the god damn time?" blair asks her, in an annoyed and kinda possessive tone, as if brooke had stolen vanessa from her.

brooke was a little shocked by the question and by the tone of blair's voice.

"i guess it's because, i don't know, our personalities are both very flirtatious and i think that's just who we are with one another. and, just look at her, how could you not?"

vanessa's heart felt like it was about to explode at the last comment.

"i have a question for you, blair, why the fuck is it anybody's business if i want to flirt with her? that's no one's business but mine and vanessa's."

vanessa kinda loved that brooke responded that way, she was defending herself, and in a way it felt like she was defending vanessa too and it made her feel protected and safe - something she had never really felt.

blair didn't say anything to that comment, she got up and went to the kitchen, vixen following after her, and so the game just continued.

a while later, at around 10pm the game ended. by that point most people were too high to even concentrate on the game, so there was no point in playing it.

but now vanessa's thoughts were solely on brooke and she couldn't seem to get the girl out of her mind and it was killing her.

everybody was now just talking to one another about who knows what and so vanessa got up and slipped out into the back garden to smoke a cigarette, she didn't do this often, only when things got too much.

vanessa had been outside for a few minutes when she heard brooke's angelic fucking voice.

"hey, what's wrong?" brooke said softly, sitting next to her on the outdoor seating.

"just feelings, i guess." vanessa took another drag of her cigarette, before putting it out.

"what kind of feelings?" brooke asked.

"it's okay, don't worry about it."

"hey, no, please don't shut me out." brooke grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently. "you can tell me anything."

"i'll tell you one day, i swear." vanessa gulped. "i just can't right now, but i will, brooke, i swear."

"okay, angel." she held the girl close, and pressed a kiss on to her forehead. "do you want to come back inside?"

"yeah."

brooke grabbed her hand, and they head back inside.

///

they leave monique's house at around 1am. brooke drives them to vanessa's, since she's pretty sober, she only feels slightly fuzzy, not really stoned or high.

they get to vanessa's and they head upstairs into her bedroom. vanessa's mom is still at work so they aren't asked any questions about why they're home so late.

they both stumble into vanessa's room, both giggling at one another. vanessa shuts the door behind them and brooke grabs both of her hands.

"hey, do you trust me?" brooke asked her.

"yeah." vanessa was caught off guard, but she didn't even have to think about her answer, she trusted this girl, a lot too.

brooke leaned into the shorter girl, wrapping her arms around her neck. she kissed her slowly, and vanessa can't help but kiss back. brooke licked along her bottom lip, biting it softly before pulling away and kissing her again. she could taste a hint of the weed they had been smoking earlier, as well as cherry coke and she couldn't get enough of it. at some point vanessa puts her hands on brooke's waist, pulling her body closer.

a few moments later brooke pulls away slowly, and vanessa can't help but crave her lips on hers again.

in that moment, it was very clear to vanessa that she liked brooke a lot, and she just hoped to god, that she felt the same way.

they fall asleep later that night, holding each other close. and the last thing on vanessa's mind is brooke, but that isn't anything new.

_**"isn't it a beautiful thing how we find people who can make us feel so happy, even at the times when we don't believe in happiness at all"** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also i must add i do not condone drinking and driving, the reason i added that part about them taking a couple shots and brooke driving them to the party is more so to prove vanessa’s trust in brooke. 
> 
> just thought i’d clear that up. hope u all enjoyed this chapter :)


	6. part five

that next week was a pretty crazy one. they spent time together, after school, almost every day. they shared many more kisses and they were touching and hugging one another a lot more than usual, if that was even possible.

by tuesday lunchtime, people started suspecting that something was going on between them.

they were sat on the field, and vanessa was sat very close to brooke, their arms were linked and they were holding hands, their fingers intertwined.

everybody was wrapped up in their own conversations for a little while so they took this time to focus on each other for a moment.

"you look so fucking good, baby." brooke whispered into vanessa's ear.

"you too, babe."

brooke's hand touched vanessa's jawline, making the shorter girl look at her. she gently kissed her, only for a moment, before pulling away and giving her a smile.

"you make me happy." brooke told her.

"you make me so fucking happy."

their moment was cut short when one of the other girls started speaking.

"oh my god, what is going on with you guys?" nina asked, excitedly.

vanessa buried her head into brooke's neck, laughing slightly. and brooke covered her face because she was probably blushing, but she's giggling along with vanessa.

///

english was the lesson after lunch and brooke was sat next to nina and they were talking about vanessa.

"so, what's going on with you and vanjie?" nina asked, straight to the point.

brooke looked away and smiled to herself, just at the thought of the girl.

"what do you mean?" brooke said, trying to hide her blushed cheeks and growing smile.

"oh come on, it's obvious that there's something going on. you guys are all over each other and every chance you get you're flirting with her or hugging her." nina started. "brooke, i've never seen vanessa as happy as she has been since you've moved here. and i don't think that's a coincidence, i think that's all down to you. she wasn't doing well before you got here, she was in a pretty bad place, not that she'd ever tell anybody that, but i think that you've helped her, a lot."

brooke took a moment to process everything nina had just said. and her heart felt a little bit hurt at the thought of vanessa not doing well, even if it was before they had met, but at the same time she felt a little bit better knowing she was making her happy.

"so, what is going on with you two?" nina asked brooke again.

"i don't know, if i'm honest." brooke paused, not knowing if she should continue or not, she didn't want to say too much. "we're attracted to each other, and i really fucking like her. she's just so cute and amazing. she means a lot to me, i don't know what else to say."

a smile appeared on brooke's face as she talked about her and vanessa, although she tried to hide it.

"why haven't you told her that you like her?" nina asked.

"i guess i'm just scared, i don't know why, i just am. like what if she doesn't feel the same?"

"brooke, oh my god, of course she feels the same way. i see the way she looks at you. you mean a lot to her."

///

the day comes to a close and brooke meets vanessa at her locker.

"hey, angel." brooke greeted her.

"hey, how was your afternoon?" vanessa asked her.

"it was okay, i missed you."

"aw, baby." vanessa said, a little sarcastically, in a drawled out voice.

"i'm serious." brooke replied, laughing at vanessa.

"i missed you too."

"good."

brooke wrapped her arms around vanessa's neck, and pulls her in for a kiss, as vanessa's hands find their way to brooke lynn's waist.

they pull away moments later before going to brooke's locker and heading their separate ways home.

///

it was wednesday after school and brooke was driving to starbucks with vanessa. as she drove, she rested her hand on vanessa's thigh, and vanessa loved it - she just felt so at home with her.

"how's your day been?" brooke asked her, she always checked in on vanessa, she cared about her a lot.

"it's been okay, i've just missed you a lot, you've been on my mind all day." they didn't have any classes together that day.

"i have?" brooke raised an eyebrow, a grin on her face.

"yeah." vanessa smiled to herself, little did brooke know - she was on her mind all of the time.

"aww, you're cute." brooke said, teasing her a little.

vanessa rolled her eyes but she was smiling, because she's around brooke and that's all that matters.

"how was your day?" vanessa asked, a moment later.

"it was okay. nina said she might be holding a party on saturday, if you wanna go."

"yeah, i'd like that."

they get to starbucks 10 minutes later and they order their usual drinks, brooke pays for them both, even though vanessa tries to persuade her that she can pay for her own. but she's grateful, because it was a cute gesture and it was a really nice thing to do.

they sit down at a table in the corner, away from everybody else. they talk for a while, about everything really, and they're holding hands across the table.

they're in starbucks for about an hour, just enjoying each other's company, before they finish up and brooke drove vanessa home.

brooke walked vanessa to her front door, and she wrapped her arms around her neck, pulling the other girl into a hug.

"i've had a really nice afternoon with you." brooke said, a smile on her face, as pulls away.

"me too, babe. thanks for buying my coffee, you didn't have to though."

"i know, but i wanted to."

vanessa grabbed brooke's hands and she leaned in to give her a kiss, brooke kissed her back, pulling her forward so that their bodies are closer together.

brooke pulled away a little while later, still holding vanessa's hands.

"drive safe, gorgeous." vanessa told brooke.

"i will do, baby."

brooke pressed a quick kiss to vanessa's cheek, before saying goodbye and getting in to her car, leaving to go home.

///

friday rolled around pretty quickly. and vanessa and brooke lynn were in biology.

"i'm so fucking bored." vanessa whispers to brooke lynn, whilst their teacher rambles on about cells.

"i know, me too." brooke paused. "do you want to hang out after school? i wanna spend more time with you."

they had spent everyday after school together, besides from tuesday, but it still wasn't enough, brooke wanted to be around vanessa every moment of the day, she just craved her presence constantly.

"yeah, i'd love that, do you wanna come to my place?"

"i like that idea. can we take your car, my mom dropped me here this morning, because she needed to talk to me about something?"

"yeah, that's fine." vanessa agreed.

///

they arrive at vanessa's house 20 minutes after leaving school, they sit down on her bed and get themselves comfortable.

they talk for a little while, and at some point brooke lynn pulls vanessa into her arms. they cuddle for a little while, just enjoying each other's company.

over the past couple of days, brooke had been thinking about what was going on between her and vanessa. they hadn't really discussed it, and she knew vanessa wouldn't bring it up - she didn't like talking about her feelings. so she decided that maybe she should just bring it up and see where the conversation goes.

"baby, can we talk please? i have some things i need to say." brooke started.

"of course, what is it?" vanessa sat up and looked at her, brooke did the same.

"so, i don't really know how to say any of this, but i need to say it, because you need to know." she stopped. "vanessa, i really like you, a lot. and i really fucking care about you. you mean the world to me and i just think you're beautiful and hilarious and amazing. and i'm sorry if that was cheesy but it's the truth, and i just thought you should know."

she trailed off towards the end, she has a smile on her face but she's scared, what if she doesn't feel the same?

vanessa's smile was wide, hearing all of that, it made her feel so happy and her heart felt so full and warm.

"babe, i really like you too." she says simply.

brooke was so fucking happy, so she wraps her arms around vanessa and they share a warm, loving hug.

she pulls away for a second, looking at her and admiring her.

"you're my world, you know that, right?" vanessa said, grabbing brooke's hand.

"i know, baby."

///

brooke stays over that night. they watch netflix together, and cuddle, and makeout, and talk, and laugh. and they just enjoy their time together.

eventually, at 3am, they get tired and decide to go to sleep.

"goodnight, baby." brooke whispers, giving vanessa a kiss.

"goodnight, beautiful."

they fall asleep, next to one another, brooke was holding vanessa close and it all just felt right.

**_"when i told you i liked you, i was lying._ **

**_i already knew i loved you."_ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope u are all enjoying this! let me know what you think in the comments if u like ;)


	7. part six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another chapter :)
> 
> \- chloe

brooke and vanessa stayed in bed until around 1pm, just wasting the day away together. vanessa cuddled in to brooke, and brooke held her close, her arms around her waist. and they both just feel at peace, being there with one another.

at around 3pm, vanessa drove brooke home, so that she can grab her makeup and clothes to get ready, at vanessa's place, for nina's party.

///

they got back to vanessa's just before 4pm, and they each took a shower before getting ready for the night. brooke took a shower first, and she comes out 15 minutes later, her body wrapped in a towel, and vanessa can't help but check her out.

"god, why are you so fucking hot?" vanessa could not believe how good she looked, even if she had just gotten out of the shower.

brooke giggled at her comment, vanessa would do this every now and then - she'd make a comment about how hot or beautiful she was and brooke just found it really cute, the way she'd hype her up.

brooke put on some underwear and vanessa was just sat there admiring the view.

"you should go take your shower, love, instead of just sitting there, watching me get dressed." brooke told vanessa, teasing her a little for staring at her.

"nah, i'm good, thanks." vanessa smirked.

brooke stood right in front of vanessa, knowing exactly what she was doing.

"you look hot, _mami_." vanessa grabbed her hips and pulls her body close.

"fuck, that was hot."

"what was?" vanessa didn't even realise what she had done.

"you saying 'mami', it just sounded so fucking good."

"thanks, _mami_." she was, of course, going to use that to her advantage, brooke liked it so why not tease her with it.

not long later vanessa went in the shower, and when she got out brooke is lying on her bed, on her phone, in an oversized t-shirt and some shorts - she hadn't gotten into her outfit for the party yet since they still had some time before they both needed to be ready.

vanessa dried herself off, and brooke's eyes move up and down her body, taking in how good she always looked.

"enjoying your view?" vanessa teased her, as she slips on some panties.

"maybe." brooke smirked, still checking her out.

vanessa continued getting ready, and brooke continued to admire her, because in her eyes she's just so perfect.

when vanessa was finished getting dressed, she lay down next to brooke and gives her a quick kiss.

"when do you wanna start getting ready for the party?" vanessa asked.

"maybe in like half an hour." brooke replies.

"yeah, sure. what do you wanna do until then?" she asked, with a playful look on her face.

"i don't know, what do you wanna do?" brooke played with vanessa's hair, moving it behind her back.

"whatever you want."

brooke grabbed the side of her neck and leans into her. her lips touch vanessa's and she kisses back, as she places an arm around her waist. the kiss becomes passionate very quickly, and they just makeout for a while - they were so caught up in being there with one another that nothing else seemed to matter but their lips touching and their bodies being so close together.

///

the party started at 7, and vanessa and brooke arrive at around 7:30. when they arrive quite a few people are already there and they all greet them, inviting them to their conversations, once they had got some drinks.

vanessa was sat next to brooke for a little while, whilst they talk to nina, monique and mayhem. but, at some point, a'keria comes over to vanessa and pulls her away to talk to her.

"so, how are you?" a'keria asked vanessa, as they walk into the kitchen, away from everybody else.

"i'm doing good, how are you?"

"i'm fine."

"so, what's up?" vanessa knew that a'keria wanted to talk to her about something.

"well, i just wanted to ask, like, what's going on with you and brooke? because ya'll have been kissing and touching, and you just seem _very_ close. what's going on?"

"like you said, we're kissing and we're touching, i don't know what you want me to tell you."

"okay...so give me details?" a'keria had a smile on face.

"like what?"

"you know what!" a'keria wanted to know everything but, of course, the first thing she wanted to know was if they had sex yet.

"not yet, but...uh...we got pretty close earlier." vanessa admitted, looking away, blushing.

* _flashback*_

_they had been making out for a while, and things were becoming more passionate and a lot more intense - like maybe this was going there._

_"you're so fucking beautiful." brooke told her, when they had stopped kissing for a second._

_"you are too, babe."_

_they went back to kissing and brooke's hands fall down vanessa's body, appreciating her, making sure she felt loved. her hands go to her ass, and she pulls her closer._

_her lips go to her neck, pressing kisses all over. soon enough, she finds her sensitive spot and vanessa lets out a quiet moan._

_she kept on touching her body, moving her hands all over and vanessa just melts under her touch. she wanted her so badly._

_they both knew where this was going, and they wanted it to go there, but they needed to get ready and they didn't want their first time together to be rushed - they wanted to take their time._

_*end of flashback*_

"i need to know more! who made the first move? all of that." a'keria said, excitedly.

"it was after monique's party, we both went back to my place because brooke was staying over. and, well, she kissed me."

"how was it?" a'keria asked.

"really nice." vanessa was blushing slightly, and she had a huge smile on her face, replaying the moment in her head.

they talk for a little while longer, and when the conversation ends vanessa goes to find brooke. she's sat in the living room still, this time it's a little more crowded and she's talking to a girl called plastique. vanessa knew the two were friends since they both took dance and they had a few other classes together. vanessa knew her too, not very well, but they were friendly.

vanessa walked over to brooke and she sat down in her lap, since there wasn't any seats available.

"hey, babe." she murmured, as brooke kissed her. "hey, plastique." she greeted the other girl too.

"hi." plastique seemed a little annoyed by vanessa's presence, but vanessa just shrugged it off.

the three of them talk for a little while, brooke had an arm tightly wrapped around vanessa, and vanessa just felt right at home.

but whilst they were talking, vanessa couldn't help but notice the way plastique would act around brooke, the way she'd look at her and how she'd giggle at everything she said.

and that's when something became very clear to vanessa: plastique had a crush on her girl. and she didn't like it one bit, maybe she was jealous.

their conversation ends when plastique gets up, and goes to get herself another drink.

"hey, what's wrong?" brooke asks vanessa, she could tell that something was up with her.

"nothing." vanessa looked away, she didn't want to talk about it, and she didn't want to cause drama.

"something's up, what's going on?"

"it's all good, don't worry about it." but brooke could tell by her tone that she wasn't telling the truth.

"vanessa, just tell me, what's this about?"

"i can't do this right now, we'll talk later."

vanessa got up and goes to get another drink, she needed to be alone for a while.

she was sat at a counter in the kitchen, on her phone, when somebody starts to talk to her.

"hey, vanessa." it was blair.

"hey."

blair sat down, across from vanessa.

"what's wrong?"

"i'm fine, you should go do whatever, you don't need to babysit me." vanessa took another sip of her drink.

"i'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong."

vanessa knew blair wasn't going anywhere, so she decided to give in and just tell her what was on her mind.

"i think plastique likes brooke."

"why do you think that?" blair asked.

"she kept looking at her all loving and shit. and i don't know, i just get a vibe."

"have you talked to brooke, like to see if she noticed?"

"nah, she kept asking me what's wrong but i didn't want to cause drama so i just kept quiet."

"you should talk to her about it."

"i know." vanessa said with a sigh. "i just don't wanna ruin shit because i think that plastique likes her, y'know."

"you won't, just tell her how you feel and you'll feel a lot better." blair grabbed her hand from across the table, giving it a little squeeze.

"yeah, you're right." vanessa wiggled out of her seat, and blair stood up with her.

"vanessa?" blair grabbed her hand once more.

"yes?"

"i know you're having a bad night, but recently you've seemed a lot happier, and i'm happy for you. even if it's because of brooke."

"what do you mean?" vanessa didn't understand what she meant by _even if it's because of brooke._

"nothing, sorry, forget i said anything." blair shook her head. "go talk to brooke, i hope it goes okay."

blair left the kitchen, leaving vanessa confused, what did she mean by that comment? she shrugged it out of her mind and she decided that she needed to talk to brooke, so she went to go find her.

she was outside with plastique and nina, and the three of them were talking, she noticed the way plastique would touch brooke's arm and stand right next to her. and it rubbed vanessa the wrong way.

she walked over to them and brooke greeted her with a smile.

"hey, baby." brooke said, pulling her into a side hug.

"hey, can we talk please, like in private?" vanessa asked.

"yeah, of course."

they go over to the seating area, another part of nina's backyard, and they sit down next to each other.

"so, i really didn't want to bring this up, but i think that i need to." vanessa was nervous, and brooke could tell.

brooke grabbed her hand, and vanessa felt a little bit more at ease.

"so earlier when we were talking to plastique, i noticed, like, some type of vibe. and i don't know how to else to say this, but i get this feeling that she likes you." vanessa was a lot quieter than usual, she was just so nervous talking about this, she didn't know how the conversation would turn out and that scared her.

"how does that make you feel?" brooke asked her, getting herself comfortable on the sofa.

"kinda jealous." vanessa admitted, looking away.

"baby, you don't have anything to worry about. i don't like her like that, i only want you, okay?" brooke touched her chin, getting vanessa to look at her.

"yeah, but i just..." but before she can continue brooke cuts her off.

"but nothing, vanessa, i don't like plastique. nobody can compete with you."

"really?" vanessa asked.

"yes, you're my everything, you're all i need."

vanessa wrapped her arms around brooke's neck, and brooke held her close.

"baby, i mean it, you know?" brooke's voice was soft and reassuring.

"i know, i just hate the thought of you with somebody else."

"but i don't want anybody else, i only want you, okay?"

vanessa nodded, and she felt at peace because brooke didn't want anybody else and that meant it was all going to be okay.

_**"all the hearts in the world and i only want yours"** _


	8. part seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey everybody :)
> 
> i just wanted to put a little preface here because i think it’s kinda necessary. this chapter contains smut, which i wrote just under a year ago so it isn’t amazing but i also don’t think it’s terrible, it’s okay you know, at least that’s what i think. basically all i wanted to say is there will be more smut possibly but i promise it’s better than this. 
> 
> but please let me know what you think of this in the comments, i appreciate any feedback.
> 
> enjoy :)
> 
> \- chloe

when monday came around, vanessa was extremely happy that she got to see brooke again, regardless of her staying the night, again, on saturday.

they met up, before homeroom, at brooke's locker and when vanessa saw her she immediately pulled her into a hug and showed her some love.

"hey, _mami_." vanessa teased, knowing that brooke liked it when she'd called her that.

"oh my god, stop that!" brooke blushed at her comment.

"stop what?" vanessa asked, a smile on her face, wrapping her arms around brooke's waist once again, acting all innocent.

"you know what that does to me." brooke said, and it takes everything in her power to not push vanessa up against the lockers and kiss her.

"i just like seeing you all flustered, it's cute." vanessa told her.

brooke couldn't even respond because vanessa pressed a kiss to her lips, so that she couldn't reply.

///

it was lunchtime and they were all sat on the field, once again. vanessa was sat next to brooke, like always, and they were making plans for after school.

"you can come hang out at my place, again, if you want." vanessa suggested.

"i'd love that, but babe i have a bunch of homework due tomorrow that i haven't done yet, so it's probably not a great idea." brooke said, a little sadly.

"that's fine, you can do it at mine." vanessa didn't care if they were going to be sat in silence for 3 hours, she just loved being around brooke.

"but you'll distract me."

"no, i won't, i swear."

she wrapped an arm around brooke's shoulders, and she pressed a kiss to her lips, trying to persuade her into coming over.

"okay, i'll come over." she sounded a little hesitant, but she would have much rather done her homework with vanessa there, than be alone.

"yes! thanks baby." she pressed another kiss to her lips, and brooke pulled her close.

///

they had been at vanessa's for a little while, and they were both sat on the floor, doing some homework. or at least brooke was trying, and vanessa kept distracting her, even though she said she wouldn't.

"brooke." vanessa said, shaking brooke's leg in an attempt to grab her attention.

"baby." still no reply.

" _mami._ " her hand was still resting on her leg.

"yes?" brooke looked at her, putting her pen down.

"i know i said that i wouldn't distract you, but that was earlier. and i want some lovin', i miss you."

brooke rolled her eyes, they were literally sat right next to each other yet vanessa still 'missed' her.

"babe, i'm right here."

"yeah, i know. but i miss you kissing me and shit."

vanessa was needy, and brooke was just starting to realise that.

brooke grabbed vanessa's face and she pressed her lips onto hers, closing the gap in between them. vanessa melted into the kiss, and her hands fall to brooke's waist. they kiss for a little while longer, brooke teasing vanessa, slowly running her tongue across her lower lip. right before slipping her tongue into her mouth. vanessa moans quietly and brooke couldn't help but think that she sounded so fucking hot, her moaning - it just did something to her.

brooke pulled away first and vanessa wasn't pleased, she just wanted more.

"why'd you pull away?" vanessa asked, pouting.

"i've got work to do, baby. i'm sorry, i'll make it up to you, i swear." she promised, as she squeezes vanessa's thigh.

and with that brooke goes back to doing her homework, and vanessa tried to get some done too, but she was too busy admiring the other girl to do anything else.

///

"hey, love." vanessa said, when she saw brooke again on tuesday morning.

"hey, baby."

vanessa placed her arms around brooke's waist, as brooke brought her closer, her arms around her neck. their lips touched and vanessa's hands moved to her ass.

"i want to see you again tonight." vanessa told her, after pulling away.

"yeah?" brooke asked, a smile on her face, pressing her body against vanessa's.

"yeah, you know i do." vanessa replied. 

"well my parents are away on a business trip, if you want to stay over."

"i'd love to."

"we barely talked last night, which is on me, so i wanna make it up to and give you my full attention, okay?"

"that sounds good to me." vanessa said with a smirk.

brooke pressed another kiss to her lips, before they both go to meet up with their friends.

///

throughout the day, it seemed the two couldn't keep their hands off of each other.

during biology, brooke had her hand rested on vanessa's thigh and every now and then she would move it a little higher. and every time she did this, vanessa would fidget a little, because brooke held so much power over her and, really, she'd let her do whatever she wanted to her.

at lunch, they were sat on some benches outside around a table. vanessa was sat on brooke's knee, even though there was enough space for that to not be the case. she had an arm wrapped around her shoulders, and brooke was holding onto her small waist. during the time they were sat there, vanessa kept stealing kisses from brooke, and brooke loved it, she wanted her even more than she already did, if that was even possible.

///

it was nearly 4pm and they were sat down on brooke's bed.

"so did you wanna watch something or..." brooke was cut off by vanessa, who seemed to have her own ideas on what to do.

"nah, baby. i'm only interested in you right now." vanessa told brooke.

she wrapped her arms around brooke's neck and brooke pulled her into her lap, so that vanessa was straddling her slightly. vanessa pressed her lips onto brooke's and she kissed her back, her hands holding her waist. the kiss was passionate, and there was a sense of urgency, like they needed one another.

vanessa pushed brooke down onto the bed, so that she was lying down. brooke's hands ran up and down her back, before giving her ass a gentle squeeze. vanessa rubbed her body against brooke's, in an attempt to try and tease her, to make her want her more.

"vanessa, i want you so bad." brooke said, breaking the kiss for a moment.

"how do you think i felt - when you were teasing me in biology?" vanessa started. "i've been so fucking horny all day."

brooke smirked, she had no idea that she had that much of an effect on vanessa.

"you have?" brooke asked.

"yeah." vanessa bit her lip, she felt a little bit embarrassed but it was the truth.

"do you want me to take care of you, baby?" brooke asked, pulling her closer, her arms around her neck this time.

"please."

brooke pulled her back in for another kiss, before flipping them over so that she was on top. her hands ran down her body, appreciating every inch of her, making sure she felt comfortable.

vanessa pulled away from the kiss, so that she could take off her white crop top, revealing a plain white bra underneath.

"you're so fucking beautiful." brooke complimented her.

"so are you, babe." vanessa told her. "your turn." vanessa said, pulling on the bottom of brooke's t-shirt, wanting to see more of her.

brooke did as she was told and took off her t-shirt, underneath she wore a black bra.

"god, you're hot." vanessa said, admiring her, and brooke giggled a little at her tone.

"glad you think so."

brooke kissed vanessa once more, before pressing her lips to vanessa's neck. she kissed down to the top of her breasts and vanessa unclasped her bra, taking it off and throwing it to the side. brooke massaged her breasts, rubbing them gently, which caused vanessa to let out a gasp at the contact.

her hands moved down vanessa's stomach before unzipping her denim skirt and pulling it down past her hips. vanessa moved the skirt down her legs, before tossing it to the side.

vanessa took this opportunity to unzip brooke's denim shorts, and pull them down to her thighs. brooke pulled them all the way down, getting out of them gracefully, before moving them out of their way.

their lips connected once again, and vanessa pulled brooke closer, wanting to feel her body on hers. their hands explored each other's bodies, grabbing and touching everywhere they could. they couldn't get enough of each other.

vanessa took off brooke's bra and she moved her hands over her breasts, caressing them lightly.

"you're so pretty, babe." vanessa told her.

"thank you, gorgeous."

brooke kissed vanessa's neck, her lips trailing down to her breasts, once more; massaging one with her hand, and planting kisses on the other. her tongue ran across her nipple, sucking on it gently, causing vanessa to moan.

she was getting more and more turned on, she needed brooke and she couldn't wait much longer.

brooke kissed all the way down vanessa's stomach, and vanessa felt herself melt underneath her touch. brooke's hands moved to her panties, rubbing her slowly over the fabric, feeling how wet she already was.

"please, babe, i want you so bad." vanessa begged her.

brooke slipped off vanessa's underwear, gently moving her fingers over her wet pussy, teasing her a little.

"are you sure, baby?" brooke asked her.

"yes, _mami_ , please i need you."

brooke worked two fingers inside of her slowly, dragging her fingers between her folds. she went back to kissing her neck, rubbing her clit as she did so. she pumped her fingers in and out of her and vanessa couldn't believe how good brooke was making her feel.

"how does that feel, baby?" brooke asked her, making sure everything was good.

"so good, oh my god." she responded, her voice a little shaky and uneven.

"do you want me to eat you out?" brooke asked her, a few minutes later.

"yes, please." she nodded slightly.

brooke pushed vanessa's legs a little further apart, before positioning herself in between them. she moved her tongue over her clit, sucking on it gently.

one of vanessa's hands fell into brooke's hair, keeping her in place as she continued to eat her out. brooke's pace was slow but deliberate, she knew what she was doing, and she knew it would drive vanessa crazy.

"fuck, oh my god, brooke." vanessa moaned, cursing her name.

vanessa rolled her hips, and brooke quickened her pace. vanessa threw her head back, as brooke's tongue worked at her clit, every lick bringing her closer to an orgasm.

"baby, i think i'm gonna..." vanessa breathed out. "fuck, _mami_."

vanessa reached her climax, pleasure running through her entire body, causing her to shake slightly, as she came on brooke's tongue.

brooke kept going for a moment longer, licking her gently to get her cleaned her up. vanessa steadied her breathing, as she came down from the high she had been feeling moments before.

brooke lay down next to vanessa, and vanessa pressed a kiss to her lips as if to say 'thank you'. she ran her hands down to brooke's panties, stroking her fingers across her pussy, over the fabric.

"you want me to return the favour, babe?" vanessa asked her seductively.

"yeah, i'd like that a lot."

vanessa positioned herself in between brooke's legs, and she slipped off her panties. she pressed her lips to her inner thighs, planting kisses all the way up to where brooke needed her mouth to be.

"vanessa, please stop teasing me, i swear to - "

brooke was cut off when she felt vanessa's tongue against her pussy, licking her slowly. vanessa began to eat her out, her tongue working at brooke's clit, whilst a hand gripped at her hips for some sort of stability. she continued doing what she was doing, and brooke was already close after getting vanessa off.

vanessa pulled her mouth away from brooke's clit, before working two fingers inside of her gently, running them through her folds. she pumped her fingers in and out of her, causing brooke to moan as her hands grasped at the sheets.

"baby, i'm close." she managed to say.

"come for me then, babe."

vanessa quickened her pace, bringing brooke to her climax. brooke's back was arched, moans escaping her lips as she came. vanessa worked her through her orgasm, before slowly pulling out her fingers and sucking on them, making eye contact with the other girl.

vanessa lay back down next to brooke and they both turned to face one another. brooke wrapped an arm around vanessa's waist, holding her close as vanessa cuddled into her.

they sat there in a comfortable silence for a moment, before vanessa spoke up.

"you're so amazing." she said to brooke, looking into her eyes.

"i think you are too." brooke replied, a smile on her face as she looked at vanessa.

"and god, you're so fucking hot."

brooke giggled at how direct she was, she loved that about vanessa.

"i'm serious." she said. "you really know how to make a girl feel good too."

brooke didn't know what to say, so she stayed quiet for a moment, knowing vanessa probably had more to say.

"you were fucking incredible, babe, you made me feel really good." vanessa's tone was soft and quiet, and she meant every word.

vanessa had slept with a good amount of people, but none of them had made her feel the way brooke just did.

"i'm glad, angel." she spoke. "you were amazing." she said, as she blushed slightly.

"yeah?" vanessa asked, and she was smiling and brooke felt like her heart was about to explode just at that.

"yeah." brooke said, looking away for a moment.

vanessa touched her chin, getting brooke to look at her, before giving her a kiss and cuddling back into her for a little while longer.

///

it was a while later, almost 10pm to be exact, and they were sat on the porch whilst brooke smoked a cigarette.

"you look so fucking cute wearing my clothes." brooke remarked, taking a look at vanessa who was wearing her white hoodie.

"you're not getting this back."

"that's fine, i like it better on you anyways."

brooke loved how it was a little bit baggy and oversized on vanessa, she thought she looked adorable.

neither of them said anything for a moment or so, instead vanessa just admired brooke as she smoked her cigarette, soaking in how good she looked.

they went back inside, a few moments later, and headed upstairs. brooke said goodnight to her brother, before getting into bed next to vanessa.

she put on some netflix, and she cuddled into vanessa, her head resting on her shoulder, as they watched orange is the new black.

after watching a few episodes brooke switched it off and lay back down next to vanessa, facing her this time.

"brooke..." vanessa's voice was shaking, because she didn't know how to say what she was about to say.

"yes, baby?"

"fuck, i don't know how to say this."

"it's okay, just take your time."

vanessa didn't say anything for a little while, she couldn't find the words to describe how she was feeling.

"what's wrong, baby?" brooke asked, playing with vanessa's hair, in an attempt to soothe her.

"i love you." vanessa said quietly, looking away.

brooke didn't say anything for a moment, but her heart felt warm and like it might burst from how happy she was feeling.

"i get it if you don't feel the same. it's just you mean so much to me and you make me so fucking happy. i've never felt this way before about anybody, but you've just changed everything for me, i'm just so grateful for you." vanessa rambled, her words hurrying out.

"vanessa, i love you too." brooke said, a smile on her face after everything she had said. "you're my fucking world."

vanessa smiled back.

"you're mine too, baby. you make everything better." vanessa told her, her arms around her neck and brooke holds her close.

"god, i'm so in love with you."

vanessa giggled at her tone, snuggling her head into her shoulder.

"i'm so in love with you too, babe."

_**"i don't think you understand how beautiful you make my world, just by existing in it."** _


	9. part eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another chapter for you all <3 also shit goes down in this chapter so get ready :)
> 
> \- chloe

it was the next day and brooke was still holding vanessa, keeping her body close, when they both woke up.

"good morning, angel." brooke spoke softly.

"good morning, babe." vanessa replied, before pressing a quick kiss to brooke's lips.

"how did you sleep?"

"really well, i always do when i'm next to you, baby." she said, a smile on her face.

"me too, love."

after a few minutes of cuddling, they both got out of bed and decided to jump into the shower together. at some point, they began making out, their hands touching everywhere they could as their bodies pressed up against each other. one thing lead to another, and they ended up having sex in the shower, maybe they couldn't get enough of one another.

///

they arrived at school a little while later, and met up with their friends after going to their lockers.

"hey, ya'll." vanessa greeted her friends, a bright smile on her face, as she and brooke held hands.

they all began talking amongst themselves for a little while before the bell rang for homeroom. vanessa kissed brooke goodbye, and they both headed to where they needed to be that morning.

///

when lunchtime finally rolled around, brooke couldn't wait to see vanessa again. they hadn't had any lessons together that morning, so she really missed being around her, especially after they had so much time together the night before.

everyone was sat on the field, in a circle, and vanessa was cuddled into brooke's side as they all talked.

"i wish i could see you again tonight, babe." vanessa whispered so that only brooke could hear.

they wouldn't be able to hang out that night as vanessa was babysitting.

"me too, baby." brooke said, before pressing a kiss to her lips.

"do your parents get back today?"

"yeah." brooke replied simply.

"i really enjoyed staying at your place last night." vanessa admitted, biting her lip as all the memories came flooding back.

"yeah? i wonder why that is." brooke teased.

"brooke!" vanessa hit her arm playfully, knowing exactly what she was talking about.

"what?" brooke giggled.

"you're right though, i loved it when we fucked." vanessa said, suddenly not caring how direct she was being.

"oh my god, vanessa!"

vanessa giggled as brooke blushed a little.

"it's true though." vanessa stated.

"yeah, i liked it too."

vanessa gave brooke another kiss, before they both continued talking to the other girls.

///

it was friday, and vanessa was sat on brooke's bed as the blonde tried on outfits for the party at brianna's that night.

"so, how about this one?" brooke asked, wearing a short emerald green dress, that was in a satin material.

"fuck, _mami_ , you look good." vanessa grabbed brooke's hands and pulled her closer.

"thanks, babe." brooke wrapped her arms around vanessa's neck, and vanessa looked up at her, taking in how flawless she looked.

"i think you should wear this tonight, you look so fucking hot."

"you think so?"

"yeah, definitely."

they shared a kiss, before they began to get ready for the party.

///

they're finished getting all dressed up at around 7pm, and they both head downstairs to wait for their uber to arrive. brooke's brother was in the kitchen, making himself some food when they entered the room.

"austin, would you tell mom i'm staying at a friends tonight? we're going out." brooke told her brother.

"yeah, i will do." austin replied. "hey, v. how's it going?"

vanessa and austin had gotten kinda close, ever since she and brooke had started spending more time together. austin knew that something was going on between the two, and he was very supportive of it. he saw that vanessa had been a light in brooke's life, and that made him happy, because god knows that brooke deserved to be happy too.

"i'm good thanks, how are you?" vanessa gave austin a hug as she spoke.

they all talked for a few more minutes, before the uber finally arrived and vanessa and brooke had to leave. they said goodbye to austin and got into the uber, driving off to the party.

///

they had been at the party for just over an hour, and they were both a little tipsy, but not quite drunk. they were dancing together, vanessa was grinding on brooke, and they were both acting kinda sexual.

the night went on, and at some point brianna gathered a bunch of people to play truth or dare. the game started off slow to begin with, most people choosing truth for a little while.

"vanessa, truth or dare?" vixen asked.

"dare."

"i dare you to kiss blair." vixen told her, knowing exactly what she was doing.

brooke could feel her heart sink, the thought of vanessa kissing anybody else killed her.

but they weren't official, vanessa wasn't hers, she had no right to be jealous.

right?

"i can't do that, i ain't kissing nobody but brooke." vanessa was quick to respond to vixen's dare.

"i'm sure she won't mind." vixen said, her tone was forward and you could tell she wanted to start some drama.

vanessa placed her hand on brooke's leg, giving it a gentle squeeze, telling her that she didn't have anything to to worry about. vanessa only wanted brooke, she hoped she knew that.

vanessa crawled over to where blair was sitting, and she pressed a quick kiss to her lips, as blair pulled her closer, her hands on vanessa's waist.

as they kissed, brooke could feel the jealousy build up inside of her. she didn't like vanessa kissing anybody else, she was just starting to realise that.

when the kiss was over, vanessa went straight back to where she was sitting, right next to brooke. she rested her hand on brooke's leg, and she moved closer to her.

"i'll make it up to you later, _mami_ , i promise." vanessa whispered into brooke's ear seductively.

brooke shook her head but she had a small grin on her face, of course this was how vanessa would handle the situation.

the game continued for a little while longer, but it eventually came to an end, a little after 9pm. vanessa grabbed brooke's hand and lead her through to the kitchen, where they both grabbed another drink.

they spent most of the night beside one another, dancing and kissing and touching; just being in love with each other. they had an amazing time together, and they were both in a really good mood. it was all going well.

but throughout the night, blair would keep looking over at the pair. it infuriated her, the way brooke would hold vanessa close and kiss her like there was nobody else in the room, the way vanessa would smile every time she was around brooke. it ruined her. and it broke her heart. especially since, at one point, she and vanessa had been very close. she was distraught by all of this, the way vanessa had gone from being her best friend to a complete stranger. a lot had happened between the two, maybe all of that would come to light someday, who knows?

brooke and vanessa left the party just after midnight. maybe they would have stayed longer if they weren't dying to rip each other's clothes off.

when they got to vanessa's, after a fifteen minute uber ride, they headed straight up to her room. their lips touched, and they began to make out, their hands roaming each other's bodies. vanessa pushed brooke on to the bed, before crawling on top of her so that she was straddling her waist. her lips moved down to her neck, and brooke wriggled underneath her with anticipation. she just wanted her so badly.

"baby, please. i need you." brooke pleaded.

vanessa decided to not tease her for much longer and just give her what she wanted, she could tease her another time but right now all she wanted to do was make her feel good.

///

when they were finished, vanessa threw an arm around brooke's waist and leaned into her to give her a quick kiss.

"i love you." vanessa whispered to her.

"i love you too, baby."

they talked for a little while longer, before saying their goodnights and falling asleep next to one another.

///

once brooke left vanessa's house, at around 3pm the next day, their weekends turned out to be pretty boring. neither of them did much, brooke spent some time with her family and did some homework, and vanessa just wasted the weekend away by missing brooke and smoking a little weed.

monday was a rough day.

and it all began in homeroom. vanessa was sat with brianna and monet at the back of the classroom, the three of them huddled around a table, and they were all talking about the party on friday.

"i think blair's got a crush on you, vanjie." brianna told her, a few minutes into their conversation.

"yeah, why do you think that?" vanessa asked, she didn't really know why she was being told this, but she was curious nevertheless.

"because, at the party, she got drunk and all in her feelings, and she was saying how she misses you and how it sucks that you're with brooke and not her." monet interjected.

"you believe this too?" vanessa raised an eyebrow.

"yeah, i do." monet replied.

"vanjie, you need to talk to her. i know something happened between you two last year, maybe you need to clear some things up." brianna suggested.

vanessa nodded, and that was the end of that conversation.

it was the start of lunch, and vanessa knew that blair would be at her locker so she went to go see her. she didn't know where this conversation would go, but she just hoped that it would go alright. maybe that was wishful thinking.

"hey, blair, can i talk to you for a minute?" vanessa asked her.

"what's this about? i can't talk right now." blair sounded done, and maybe she was.

"monet and brianna told me about what happened at the party on friday."

"what did they say?"

suddenly blair was feeling very vulnerable, she didn't want to have this conversation right now, she didn't want vanessa to know what she felt towards her.

"they told me everything." vanessa replied.

blair didn't say anything for a few moments, she was too busy trying to figure out what she would like to say to vanessa.

"i just don't get it." blair started. "last year, we were so close, vanessa. you meant the world to me."

blair's voice was shaking, and tears were threatening to fall from her eyes.

"but now, it's like i don't even exist." she said sadly, taking a pause. "do you not remember what happened between us last year?"

vanessa thought back to all the parties that had taken place at the start of the school year. they'd get drunk and they'd kiss, it happened multiple times, but nobody ever brought it up. and at one point, they almost hooked up, but vanessa couldn't go through with it, she cared far too much for blair to let things go any further.

"we were drunk." vanessa told her, and she didn't mean to be so direct but here she was. "i'm sorry."

"no you're not." blair said coldly. "i don't think anybody's ever told you this, but your actions have fucking consequences, vanessa. and because of yours, i ended up getting hurt."

she raised her voice, and it was shaky, and she could feel tears fall down her face.

"blair, i didn't mean to hurt you, i just - " but before she could say any more she was cut off.

"maybe not, but you did. and now i have to pretend like everything's okay when it's not! vanessa, i fucking love you, i really do. and it hurts so bad, knowing that you never felt anything towards me." blair's tone changed in that moment, and it looked like she was about to cry.

"i'm sorry, i really am." vanessa told her.

she meant it too. she felt bad but what could she do to fix this? it wasn't her fault that blair had fallen for her.

but maybe she shouldn't have kissed her that first time, and maybe she shouldn't have lead her on and kissed back every time they got drunk.

but how was she supposed to know that those small actions would lead to this?

"i just don't think you understand how much this is all hurting me, i hate seeing you and brooke together. every time she's with you, i feel like i can't breathe." blair spoke.

vanessa truly did feel bad, she thought about how she'd feel if she had to watch brooke fall in love with somebody else, and that thought was enough to make her spiral.

"but i see how happy you are with her, and it makes things seem a little bit more bearable, because at least your happy, you know?" blair continued.

vanessa nodded, she knew blair had a lot more to say.

"but i can't help but think that you deserve so much better. i just know how all of this is going to end, you're going to get your heart broken, and it's going to ruin you. she has so much power over you, vanessa, that i think you'd let her do it all over again too. she's not right for you, i just hope you realise that sooner rather than later."

"blair, don't say that." vanessa could feel herself about to fall apart.

"i'm just being honest with you, i've been quiet for too long." she took a pause. "i don't think she loves you, vanessa, i don't think she knows how."

"i can't do this right now."

vanessa was about to walk away, when blair grabbed her hand.

"no, please don't leave, i'm sorry, i shouldn't have said any of that." blair pleaded with her.

"just leave me the fuck alone."

she walked away, leaving blair alone in the hallway, and she grabbed her stuff from her locker. she decided she needed to get out of school, she couldn't deal with all of the bullshit that was going on.

she got in her car and drove back home, and as she was driving she could feel all of her emotions building up. she needed to cry, she needed to let it all out.

she went up to her room and laid down on her bed. the conversation with blair was still running through her mind, and it was driving her insane. she felt bad, in a way, she had hurt blair and she knew that it had fucked her up.

but blair had hurt her too. everything that she had said to her about brooke not loving her and that she was going to break her heart, it really messed with her head. it made her doubt everything.

she spent the rest of the school day lying in bed, under the covers, watching some netflix. she needed to distract herself from her feelings, she didn't want to deal with them.

when she checked her phone at 3:30pm, she saw that she had received 4 messages from brooke.

**brooke:** _hey baby, i haven't seen you since this morning. did you go home?_

**brooke:** _blair told me that you guys spoke, she seemed upset. is this to do with her?_

**brooke:** _im really worried baby_

**brooke:** _im coming over and bringing you taco bell_

vanessa read her messages, and it warmed her heart to see how much brooke cared. she was so grateful for her, she hoped she knew that.

**vanessa:** _thank u sm bby, we'll talk when u get here_

brooke knocked at her door ten minutes later, and vanessa hurried downstairs to answer it. she let brooke inside, and they hugged for a moment. vanessa felt like it was all going to be okay, just because she was in brooke's arms.

maybe she was fucked.

they headed upstairs, brooke gave vanessa her taco bell, and she slipped off her shoes and took off her jacket as vanessa got back into bed, ready to eat her food. brooke got in beside her, and snuggled next to her as she ate.

"you're so fucking cute, buying me food and shit." vanessa said to her. "thanks, babe."

"you're welcome, baby." brooke replied, before pressing a kiss to her forehead.

a little while later, vanessa had finished eating, and she was now cuddled into brooke. brooke was rubbing her back, and holding her close, when vanessa started feeling like maybe brooke deserved to know what happened between her and blair at lunch.

"brooke, can we talk please?" vanessa asked.

"yes, baby." brooke agreed.

vanessa sat up slightly, so that she was facing brooke, and brooke grabbed her hand, because she could tell that she was nervous to talk to her about this entire situation.

vanessa began to tell her about what happened that lunchtime, and brooke listened intently, paying attention to her every word. she comforted her as she spoke, she knew that this situation was tearing her apart.

it broke brooke's heart to see vanessa so hurt over this. she just wanted to fix all of this, she wanted for vanessa to feel okay.

but most of all, she wanted to make sure that vanessa felt loved, since she knew that she was doubting everything after blair's comment.

when they had finished talking about vanessa's day, brooke pulled her into her lap and gave her a kiss. vanessa wrapped her arms around brooke's neck, and she pressed their bodies together.

"how was your day, baby?" vanessa asked brooke, wanting to take the attention off of herself.

"it was alright, i just missed you." brooke admitted.

"you did?" vanessa grinned.

"yeah." brooke said coyly, smiling back at vanessa.

"maybe you should show me how much you've missed me then." vanessa suggested.

their lips touched, and soon enough they were making out. their bodies were pressed up against each other and they were starting to undress one another. brooke flipped them over, so that she was on top, and she soaked in how beautiful vanessa looked underneath her. god _,_ she was so unbelievably perfect.

///

the sex had once again been amazing, it was slow and passionate and loving, and perhaps brooke had made vanessa come three times.

it was now nearing 8pm, and the two were cuddled under the covers.

"are you staying here tonight?" vanessa asked brooke, looking up at her for a moment.

"do you want me to, baby?"

"is that okay?"

vanessa needed brooke here with her, she didn't want to be alone tonight, not after everything that had happened with blair.

"of course, let me just text my mom so that she knows." brooke replied.

the rest of the night was spent cuddling and watching netflix, it was something they always seemed to do.

but at some point, at around midnight, brooke looked over at vanessa, and she had fallen asleep. she looked so calm and peaceful and like she had no problems or worries.

brooke got out of bed to switch off the tv, and she made sure that she was quiet and careful, she didn't want to wake vanessa up, not when she looked so peaceful.

she lay back down, and brought vanessa closer. and as she closed her eyes, she couldn't help but smile to herself. this girl was becoming her world, and she was so unmistakably in love with her.

and in that moment she knew she was screwed.

_**"i knew it would blow up in the end but i wanted it anyway"** _


	10. part nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have a few more chapters to post and it will be all caught up with the chapters i have over on wattpad, if that makes sense ? i’m tired rn so i can’t think how to word all of that properly. basically this fic will be up to date very soon and i can start posting new chapters :)
> 
> hope u are enjoying <3
> 
> \- chloe

it was the next day and vanessa was the first to wake up. she looked over at brooke, who was still sleeping peacefully next to her, and smiled to herself. she always looked so beautiful, even when she was sleeping.

vanessa gently ran her fingers through brooke's hair, before letting an arm drop down to her waist, pulling her closer.

"good morning, _mami_." vanessa whispered into brooke's ear.

"morning, babe." brooke slowly opened her eyes, and she let out a yawn.

"you still tired?" vanessa asked her, moving even closer to the girl.

"yeah, a little."

"how about we skip school?" vanessa suggested.

brooke knew it was a bad idea, she really did, but she wanted nothing more than to just lay there with vanessa all day.

"we can sleep for a little while longer, and then we could binge watch a shane dawson series, and then we could fuck, baby, just think about it for a moment." vanessa tried to persuade her.

and fuck, it sounded so tempting.

brooke knew she shouldn't be skipping school. her parents would kill her. but she had made a few bad decisions before, one more wouldn't hurt.

"that sounds so fucking good." brooke replied, still sounding tired.

vanessa leaned into brooke, giving the canadian her morning kiss.

"baby, can we go back to sleep please?" brooke asked.

"yeah, i'm so fucking tired."

brooke giggled at how sleepy she sounded, before pulling vanessa's small body close to her own.

a few minutes later, the two fell asleep, vanessa was cuddled into brooke, and she had her leg hooked around brooke's waist.

///

they were both awake by 10am, and they spent the rest of the day together. they watched youtube for a little while, as they ate some snacks.

but by the time it got to 2pm, they couldn't keep their hands off of each for much longer so they ending up fucking once again.

brooke left at around 4pm, and when she got home she headed straight up to her room. there was a knock on her bedroom door, not too long later.

"hey, can i come in?" it was her brother austin.

"yeah."

"you didn't come home last night, were you at vanessa's?" austin asked.

"yeah i was."

"i'm guessing you didn't go to school either, i didn't see you there today." he said.

"i didn't, no, but please don't tell mom and dad."

"i wasn't going to." he told her. "i'm really happy for you, b. you seem so much happier than you were back in canada."

"i am." brooke nodded. "i've found somebody who i really care about, i have some good friends, everything's going really well."

"you deserve that, you know? i know you weren't doing well before we moved here, i'm just glad that you're happy."

"thanks, austin." brooke smiled.

brooke and her brother had always been really close, and he had always been so supportive of her, and he had always been there for her. it made her happy that he'd still check on her, and it also made her happy that for once she could say that she was genuinely doing well.

austin smiled back at his sister, before leaving brooke's room.

brooke spent the next hour or so doing the homework she had received on monday. she ate dinner at around 7, before jumping in the shower and getting into some pyjamas.

she was cuddled up in bed by 10pm, and she was watching some crappy reality television show, whilst she and vanessa facetimed.

"vanessa, you're so fucking hot." brooke told her.

vanessa had just got out of the shower, and was slipping on some underwear, after she had dried herself off.

"thanks, love."

brooke bit her lip as her eyes ran over vanessa's body, her toned stomach and perfect tits on show. she couldn't believe how perfect this girl was.

"i can see you checking me out, _mami."_ vanessa teased, causing brooke to blush.

she sprayed on some body mist, before pulling on the white hoodie she had stolen from brooke, it covered her ass and the sleeves were a little bit too big, but she loved it. she just loved wearing brooke's clothes, she couldn't explain it. maybe it was because it always felt like a piece of brooke was with her.

"you know what i'm gonna do tonight? smoke some weed." vanessa announced, as she grabbed her secret stash from underneath the bed.

"that sounds good, baby."

half an hour went by, and vanessa was already pretty high. she was unusually calm, which blew brooke's mind since she was always so loud and full of energy. she was also so relaxed, and brooke could tell that she was happy, and it made her heart feel so full, seeing vanessa happy was perhaps her favourite thing in the world.

they ended up talking until almost 2am. brooke knew she'd be extremely tired at school, but talking to the girl she was so in love with and seeing her so happy, she decided maybe it was worth it.

///

vanessa and brooke were sat at the back of the art building that lunchtime. they were away from all of their friends, since they had a feeling that some more drama would possibly go down after what happened on monday. and neither of them had the energy to deal with any of that.

"i've got history with blair next." vanessa sighed, half way through lunch break.

"are you gonna talk to her?" brooke asked.

"i'm not sure." she paused. "i just don't want for it to turn out like monday."

brooke nodded, understanding where she was coming from.

they continued to talk for a little while longer, before heading to their lockers to pick up their books for next lesson. brooke walked vanessa to history, and the two shared a kiss, before brooke headed to her next lesson.

///

history had finished, and vanessa was about to head to her next lesson, when blair pulled her to the side to talk to her.

"look, i know i'm probably the last person you want to talk to right now, but i need to talk to you, vanessa. so can you please come to my place after school and we can talk this through?" blair asked her.

"what do we need to talk through?" vanessa replied.

"i still have a lot to say to you, and i just want to make sure we're okay." blair explained.

vanessa thought for a moment. she didn't know if she could do this, she didn't think her heart could take it if the conversation ended like it did last time - with blair saying the stuff she said about brooke.

"okay, yeah." vanessa hesitated. "i'll meet you in the parking lot."

///

it was the end of the day and vanessa was at brooke's locker, after she had grabbed her stuff.

"i'm going to blair's house." vanessa announced.

"when?" brooke asked calmly.

"soon."

"did she ask you?"

vanessa nodded.

"i hope it goes okay, baby."

"me too." vanessa looked away.

brooke could tell that vanessa was nervous about talking to blair again. and it got her worried too, she didn't want for her to get hurt again. it broke her fucking heart.

"baby, look at me." brooke touched her chin. "it's going to be okay."

brooke pressed a gentle kiss to vanessa's lips, as she held her close.

vanessa pulled away a few moments later, telling her that she'd call her later that night, before leaving to meet blair in the parking lot.

///

they arrived at blair's house 20 minutes later. the car ride was quiet and awkward, and there was a lot of tension, because they each knew they had a lot to say.

the two sat up in blair's room, across from each other on her bed.

"i'm really sorry about what happened on monday, i shouldn't have said any of those things. i was just hurt, and it had all gotten too much." blair spoke.

"look, i know you were hurting, but hearing you say all of the stuff about how brooke doesn't love me, that hurt me too." vanessa said.

"i didn't mean to hurt you, i promise. i just wanted you to understand how i was feeling. i thought maybe if i found the right words, you'd be able to see how much this was hurting me."

"and i get that. i just don't understand why you had to drag brooke into this."

"i don't know why i did that either. i'm sorry, vanessa." blair apologised.

"it's okay."

"it's not, i had no right to make assumptions and give you my opinion on your relationship. i shouldn't have done that, i'm really sorry." blair said sincerely.

"it's fine, i promise." vanessa told her. "i'm sorry too, i never meant to hurt you."

"i know you didn't." blair gave her a sad smile. "i just want you to be happy, you know?"

"i am."

"i'm glad."

///

as the days went by, it seemed that brooke and vanessa were closer than ever. everybody could see that the two had a lot of love for each other. and because of this, nobody could understand why they weren't officially dating. it didn't make any sense, especially when it was clear that neither of them wanted anybody else.

but maybe it was because they were both scared. every relationship that vanessa had been in ended badly, she either got cheated on or the person would get bored of her and leave. and because of that, she was afraid of getting into another relationship. she didn't want for any of that to happen to her again.

brooke was scared too, because she had a tendency to fuck things up. and she _really_ did not want to fuck things up with vanessa.

///

it was saturday night, and brooke and vanessa were at the beach with their friends.

it was nearing 8pm, and brooke was sat on a blue beach towel, right beside nina, watching as monique took pictures of vanessa for her instagram.

"so you still haven't asked her, have you?" nina asked brooke.

"i haven't, no." brooke shook her head.

"why not?"

"i'm terrified." she said simply. "we love each other a lot, but it's just scary, you know?"

nina nodded.

"i just don't wanna fuck things up like i always do." brooke told her. "but i need her. and i love her so much. and i want to ask her to be my girlfriend."

"oh my god! that's amazing." nina exclaimed.

"shh." brooke playfully hit her arm, giggling slightly at her friends excitement.

"i'm sorry." nina giggled too. "but this is just so exciting! i'm so happy that you're going to ask her."

"me too." brooke smiled.

vanessa came over to see them, about ten minutes later, and she sat down right beside brooke, cuddling into her, as she joined their conversation.

about twenty minutes passed, and nina went to go see a few of the other girls, leaving brooke and vanessa alone.

vanessa sat herself in brooke's lap, and she draped her arms around her neck. brooke rested her hands on her waist, supporting her and keeping her close, as vanessa pressed a gentle kiss to her lips.

"i have something to ask you, v." brooke told her.

"yeah, what is it, baby?"

"will you please be my girlfriend?" brooke asked her.

vanessa's face lighted up, and a huge smile appeared on her face.

"yes, of course i will." vanessa responded.

she hugged brooke tightly, before kissing her passionately, as their bodies touched. and in that moment vanessa felt the happiest she had ever felt. brooke had asked her to be her girlfriend and somehow nothing else seemed to matter.

**_"fuck i'm so in love with you. you can't even imagine"_ **


	11. part ten

it was just after midnight, and vanessa and brooke were driving back to vanessa's house. brooke was staying the night, and vanessa was so fucking happy because she loved it when she'd sleep over.

they got to vanessa's house just over twenty minutes later. they headed upstairs to her room, and decided to get into some pyjamas. brooke wore the ones that she kept at vanessa's for every time she slept over, and vanessa wore an old t-shirt and some shorts.

they both removed their makeup and brushed their teeth in the bathroom, before heading back to vanessa's room.

brooke sat down on the bed and leaned back slightly as vanessa crawled into her lap. vanessa kissed brooke with a sense of urgency, as she wrapped her arms around her neck and pushed her down onto the bed. brooke's hands fell to her ass, pulling the girl's body closer to her own. vanessa rolled her hips against brooke, which got the blonde frustrated and worked up. she wanted vanessa so fucking badly.

brooke flipped them over, and things escalated pretty quickly once again.

///

it was almost 3am, and brooke and vanessa were cuddling in bed. they were talking and having a heart-to-heart about their feelings.

"i can't believe that you're my girlfriend." vanessa said happily, a huge smile on her face. "i've never been this happy in my entire life. and i mean it. you just make me so fucking happy, brooke."

brooke smiled too, and she could feel how her heart went warm and fuzzy at vanessa's words.

"baby, i love you so much." brooke pulled her closer. "and you make me so happy, you have no idea."

vanessa smiled up at brooke. she felt so safe and calm and at peace lying there with her. she just made everything so much better.

///

brooke was the first to wake up on sunday morning. she looked over at vanessa, who was still sleeping peacefully, and she smiled to herself - she wished that she could wake up next to the brunette every morning.

vanessa's eyes started to flutter open, not too long later, and so brooke took the moment to press a soft kiss to the other girl's lips.

"morning, beautiful." brooke whispered as she pulled away.

a smile grew on vanessa's face, as she remembered that brooke had stayed the night.

"g'morning." vanessa spoke as she stretched.

the two lay there for a little while longer, before they decided to go make themselves some breakfast, despite it nearly being lunchtime.

they headed downstairs and into the kitchen, and looked through the cupboards as they decided on what to eat. they ended up just having a pop tart each, before drinking some water and heading back upstairs.

they spent the rest of sunday together, cuddling and kissing, until it got to 5pm and brooke had to head home.

///

it was monday morning and brooke and vanessa walked into school, holding hands like always, with smiles on their faces. they decided that today they would tell their friends that they were dating, although they knew that nobody would be surprised.

they walked over to where their friends were stood in the hallway, still holding hands as they did so.

"you bitches listen up, me and brooke have something to tell ya'll." vanessa spoke brashly.

"what is it?" mayhem asked them.

"so i asked vanessa to be my girlfriend." brooke started.

"and i said yes!" vanessa said loudly and she sounded so happy.

"oh my fucking god, finally!" aquaria said excitedly, as she pulled vanessa into a hug.

everybody congratulated them and gave them hugs and showed them some love. and it felt so good to see how much their friends supported them, it was an amazing feeling.

their days went by like normal, their lessons were boring, and they didn't see each other a whole lot until lunchtime rolled around.

everybody was sat down near the tennis courts. vanessa was sat in brooke's lap and she had an arm around her shoulders.

"you're my fucking girlfriend." vanessa whispered to brooke.

"i am, baby." brooke smiled.

vanessa pulled brooke closer, and she pressed their lips together, before kissing her a few more times.

"ya'll need to get a room." monet said, causing vanessa to giggle into brooke's shoulder.

"sorry ya'll, i can't keep my hands off of her." vanessa confessed.

"yeah, we can see that, girl." monet retorted, causing vanessa, and brooke, to laugh again.

///

a couple of days went by, and everything had been going extremely well. they had been hanging out everyday, and showing their love for one another, and everything was absolutely perfect. they were both so fucking happy.

but something happened on wednesday, and it ended up being a pretty rough day.

it was morning and vanessa was at her locker sorting out her stuff, when she felt two hands grasp around her waist.

"hey, gorgeous." it was brooke.

"hey, baby."

vanessa turned around and pressed a kiss to her lips to greet her. brooke kissed back and they had a little moment together until silky, a girl vanessa used to be friends with, decided to go ahead and ruin that.

"so are ya'll like a thing now?" silky asked brashly.

"yes we are, what's it to you?" vanessa replied, clearly not wanting to talk to the person she once considered her best friend.

"i was just wondering, since ya'll have been extra close recently." silky responded, taking a little pause. "brooke, i just wanna warn you, vanessa, here is a little bit of a player."

brooke rolled her eyes. silky wasn't the first person to tell her that vanessa was a player. a few people had made these sorts of comments before, and she didn't understand any of it.

vanessa had been very open with her about how many people she had dated and hooked up with, and none of that mattered to her. she didn't care about how many people vanessa had kissed or slept with, those numbers didn't make her a player.

"she'll use you until she gets bored, and then she'll throw you away just like she does with everybody else." silky continued.

vanessa was hurt. and what silky was saying got her feeling a lot of emotions. she wasn't using brooke, she loved that girl so much that it almost hurt, there was no way that she was using her. and she didn't understand why silky couldn't see that.

"brooke, she's not worth it, nobody else cares about her, why should you?" silky asked brooke.

vanessa felt like she was about to break down. silky's words had hit her hard, and it struck something inside of her. she had felt like nobody cared her entire life; her dad had left when she was nine, and even when he was around she was sure that he never loved her. her mom never cared much either, she loved drugs and money and alcohol way too much to even have room for vanessa in her heart.

and, because of that, the thought of brooke not caring about her made her feel as though everything was about to fall apart.

and maybe it was.

"silky, i don't know what the fuck i ever did to you, but you need to leave me and brooke the fuck alone." vanessa spat, before slamming her locker door shut and walking down the corridor, and into the girls bathroom.

"what the fuck is wrong with you?" brooke said to silky, before leaving her alone to go find vanessa.

when brooke saw vanessa sat up against the bathroom wall, crying with her head in her hands, her heart broke in two. it made her so upset and angry that somebody would hurt her the way they did. vanessa didn't deserve this, she knew that for a fact.

brooke walked over to her, and wrapped her arms around vanessa, holding her body close to her own. she just wanted to fix everything, she didn't want to see vanessa hurting like this. she just wanted to make all of her problems go away.

"i'm here, baby." brooke rubbed her back, soothingly as she spoke. "shh, it's okay, i've got you."

vanessa clung onto brooke, as she cried into her shoulder, her body shaking.

"baby, it's all gonna be okay, i promise you. i'm here, i'm not going anywhere." brooke continued.

a couple of minutes went by, and brooke managed to calm vanessa down.

"i'm sorry, brooke." vanessa sniffled, still crying a little.

"don't be sorry. you haven't done anything wrong, baby." brooke told her, her fingers touching her chin, getting the brunette to look at her.

"i know, it's just..." vanessa couldn't find the words to explain how she was feeling in that moment.

"what is it?"

"i don't know."

"do you wanna talk about this later instead, baby?"

brooke could tell that vanessa wasn't doing good after what happened with silky, and so she didn't want to push her to talk if she wasn't ready.

"yes, please."

///

brooke drove them back to her place after school that day. they went straight up to her room and got themselves comfortable on the bed. vanessa was sat in front of brooke, and her heart felt heavy. so many thoughts were running through her head, she didn't know what to think about any of this.

"come here, baby girl."

vanessa moved over to brooke, and straddled her lap as she draped her arms around her neck.

"you know i don't believe anything that silky said, right?" brooke said softly, as her hands held vanessa's hips.

"mhmm." vanessa nodded slightly. "i'm just so fucking hurt, i don't know why she'd say any of that. me and her used to be so fucking close, brooke. what the fuck did i do to deserve that?"

more tears came out of vanessa's eyes as she spoke and it broke brooke's heart.

"baby," brooke cooed, as she brought vanessa's body closer. "you don't deserve any of this, i'm so sorry that she did this to you."

vanessa cried softly into brooke's shoulder, like she had done earlier that day, and brooke held her close as she rubbed her back.

"i just don't wanna lose you." vanessa sobbed.

"you're not going to lose me, i'm not going anywhere, baby, i promise." brooke told her.

they stayed like that for a little while longer. brooke spoke to her softly, she played with her hair, and ran her fingertips up and down her back. and at some point vanessa stopped crying and she lay down beside brooke.

"thank you so much, brooke."

"for what, angel?" brooke asked her.

"for being here for me." vanessa replied. "i'm so fucking grateful for you, you have no idea."

"i know you are." brooke said simply.

vanessa let out a small yawn as she cuddled further into brooke's side.

"go to sleep, baby, if you want. you've had a tough day today, you deserve some rest." brooke suggested.

a little while later, vanessa fell asleep in brooke's arms, and not long after that brooke fell asleep too.

maybe everything would be okay. they had each other. and that's all that seemed to matter anymore.

_**"i look at you, and i just love you, and it terrifies me. it terrifies me what i would do for you."** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you all enjoying this :) let me know your thoughts in the comments <3 
> 
> \- chloe


	12. part eleven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another chapter for ya’ll :)
> 
> \- chloe

it was later that night, nearing 9pm, and brooke was driving around the city with vanessa in the passenger seat. they were singing along to the music that was playing on vanessa's phone. brooke had one hand rested on the brunette's leg as she drove with the other.

" _now my life is sweet like cinnamon, like the fucking dream i'm living in. baby, love me cause i'm playing on the radio_."

brooke looked over at vanessa, a huge smile on her face as she watched her girlfriend sing along to lana del rey.

" _lick me up and take me like a vitamin, cause my body's sweet like sugar venom, oh yeah, baby love me cause i'm playing on the_ \- what you smiling at, boo?" vanessa asked, a smile on her face too.

"you're just so fucking cute." brooke told her.

"thanks, _mami_." vanessa said, as she grabbed brooke's hand and intertwined their fingers.

"do you want to stay with me tonight, baby girl?" brooke offered.

"yeah, i'd love that."

///

it was 10pm, and they were back in brooke's bedroom like they had been earlier that night. brooke was sat on the bed, trying to finish her maths homework that was due for the next day, whilst vanessa got undressed.

"babe..." vanessa whined.

"yes?" brooke looked up.

"can i wear your pink hoodie?" vanessa asked.

"yeah, of course, baby. just use whatever you want ."

"thank you."

when vanessa was finished getting changed, she sat down next to brooke on the bed and wrapped her arms around her shoulders.

"you nearly finished, baby?" vanessa asked.

"mhmm, i'm just gonna do it over lunch tomorrow. i wanna spend time with you instead." brooke said, moving her homework to the side.

"awww." vanessa cooed. "you cute."

brooke let out a giggle, and vanessa pressed their lips together, as she pulled her body closer. brooke pulled vanessa into her lap and placed her hands on her hips. they stayed like that for a while, sharing kisses as their bodies pressed up against each other.

"baby, you're so fucking amazing." vanessa said, seemingly out of nowhere.

brooke couldn't help but smile, she always found it really cute when vanessa would randomly say stuff like this.

"oh yeah?" brooke smirked.

"yeah." vanessa confirmed, a smile on her face too. "you've helped me so much today, brooke, i don't think you understand. i was feeling so hurt and upset by what went down with silky, but somehow you managed to calm me down and make everything so much better. i can't even begin to explain how fucking grateful i am for that."

"i'm glad i could help, baby." brooke said simply.

she hated seeing vanessa hurt. and so whenever she would get upset, brooke's natural response was to just be there for her and care for her and show her some love. she just wanted to fix everything, and make all of her problems go away.

vanessa gave brooke another kiss, as if to say thank you for everything she had done, before changing the subject - she wanted to forget about all of the pain she had been feeling earlier that day.

"babe, can we watch orange is the new black, please?" vanessa asked.

brooke agreed, and so that was how they spent the rest of the night.

///

a few days went by and everything was going well. their bond was stronger than ever and they were falling more and more in love each day. they were spending so much time together, going on cute dates, driving around the city at night and they had even been hanging out with brooke's family too.

brooke's mom and dad didn't know that the two were dating. they had decided it would best if they didn't tell them just yet, they were waiting for the right moment. brooke was nervous about telling them because they weren't exactly the most supportive when she had came out as bisexual at the start of the year, and she didn't want for everything to blow up again. she just wanted to enjoy what she and vanessa had for a little while longer, without all of the complications.

it was tuesday morning, and vanessa had woken up in brooke's bed - it was something that had been happening a lot recently. seeing brooke laying next to her when she woke up was her favourite feeling ever, she still couldn't understand how she had got so lucky.

vanessa cuddled further into brooke's side, wrapping an arm around her waist as she gave her a gentle kiss.

"good morning, babe." vanessa spoke.

"morning." brooke whispered, slowly opening her eyes, smiling when she saw vanessa watching her intently.

brooke wrapped her arms around the brunette, bringing her body close to her own. vanessa hooked her leg around brooke's waist, so that she was lying on top of her slightly.

"are you comfortable now?" brooke smirked, vanessa always loved being so close to her.

"yeah, thanks." vanessa giggled.

she placed another kiss to brooke's lips, and they stayed cuddling for a few more minutes.

///

it was the lesson before lunch, and brooke was in pe walking down to the tennis courts with yvie and scarlet. she had became friends with the couple not long after her move to california. they had a few classes together, and she got along well with both of them. most of the time, anyway.

"so how are you and vanessa?" scarlet asked, cheerfully.

"we're really good." brooke said vaguely, but she had a huge smile on her face.

"i'm so happy for you both. i've known vanessa since elementary school, and i've never seen her so fucking happy. me and her, we don't talk a lot but i can tell that you're good for her." scarlet told her.

brooke smiled in response, it made her so happy, knowing that she made vanessa happy.

"i heard about what silky said to you guys." yvie began.

"okay?" brooke raised an eyebrow, not entirely sure about where this was going.

"we were talking the other day. i don't really agree with a lot of what silky says, but i do actually think she's right about vanessa."

brooke couldn't believe it, but she was going to let yvie have her moment.

"i just think that vanessa is a little bit of a player. before you got here she dated a bunch of people, and none of those relationships - if you can even call them that - lasted longer than a few weeks. look, all i'm saying is that you need to be careful, that girl plays games." yvie continued.

"i get that you're trying to look out for me, but i've heard all of this bullshit before. vanessa's told me about her past, and i respect her. why the fuck do you care about how many people she's dated?"

brooke was starting to get defensive. she didn't like people saying shit about her girl.

"i'm just trying to protect you. you need to understand what you're getting into with her." yvie was also starting to get defensive.

"i don't need protecting!" brooke told her. "i'm happy with her, and i love her so fucking much. i don't understand why you think that your opinion is going to change any of that."

"you're wasting your time with her." yvie raised her voice.

"fuck off, yvie."

brooke was done.

///

it was lunchtime and everybody was sat at the benches. vanessa was beside brooke, and she could tell that something was up. brooke barely touched her lunch and she seemed to keep zoning out, like her mind was somewhere else.

"baby, what's wrong?" vanessa asked, giving brooke's hand a gentle squeeze.

"nothing." brooke replied, but vanessa wasn't convinced.

"i can tell when something's up." vanessa told her.

"don't worry about it." brooke assured her, looking down at her lap.

"baby, look at me."

vanessa touched brooke's chin, getting her to look at her again.

"i know that something's bothering you, and if you don't want to talk about it right now that's okay. i just need you to know that you can tell me anything. i'm your girlfriend, baby. we can fight through whatever's bothering you together, okay?" vanessa said softly.

brooke nodded, and vanessa kissed her gently.

"i'll tell you later, baby girl." brooke told her.

"okay."

and that was enough for vanessa.

///

it was around 3:30pm and they were up in vanessa's room, sat on her bed.

"what happened today, babe?" vanessa asked her, as she played with brooke's hair.

"i got into an argument with yvie." brooke told her, looking down at her lap like she had done earlier that day.

"what was it about?"

"you." brooke said simply, looking back up at the brunette.

"me?" vanessa was shocked, to say the least.

brooke nodded.

"what happened?" vanessa asked.

"she said that she spoke with silky, about what happened, and that she agreed with everything that she said. she was saying that you play games and that i need to be careful." brooke began to explain.

vanessa grabbed brooke's hand, and intertwined their fingers, which put brooke at ease.

"and so i got ... kinda defensive, because i don't like people saying shit about you, but then she told me that she's just trying to protect me, which is fucking ridiculous."

"what happened next?"

"well i got mad at her, and she got mad at me. she told me that i'm wasting my time with you, so i told her to fuck off."

"you said that?"

"yeah."

"fuck."

"what?"

vanessa was quiet for a moment, just thinking and processing everything that brooke had just told her. she felt bad that she and yvie had got into an argument over her, because the two had been getting along extremely well. but she also felt really fucking grateful for brooke and how she handled the situation. she stood by her girl and that meant a lot to vanessa.

"i can't believe you'd defend me like that." vanessa said eventually, a small smile on her face.

"of course i did, baby. i can't stand when people say nasty shit about you or our relationship."

vanessa's heart melted, she was just starting to realise that she loved seeing this side of brooke.

"damn, you're real protective, _mami._ " vanessa teased as she moved closer to brooke, wrapping her arms around her neck.

"yeah, i am." brooke admitted, a little shyly, as she brought vanessa into her lap.

"that's fucking hot." vanessa whispered, her voice all seductive.

brooke rolled her eyes, because of course vanessa would go there. but she was smiling, and was feeling very fucking grateful for vanessa and how she handled things. she always listened to her and would talk things through, and then when all was said and done she knew exactly what to do in order to cheer brooke up. and brooke couldn't help but think that she was one of the lucky ones.

"oh yeah?" brooke smirked.

vanessa nodded, and their eyes met once more.

"i want you." brooke said simply.

and vanessa wanted her too.

_**"deep down you just want to be loved in a way that calms your soul"** _


	13. part twelve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey everybody :)
> 
> so one more chapter after this and i am up to date with everything and i can start posting new, fresh chapters! also want to say thank u for the comments i really appreciate them <3
> 
> \- chloe

it was an hour or so later and they were sat on the floor, against the bed, watching a movie on vanessa's laptop. they had gathered some snacks and put on some face masks, and they were having a cute, low key night together.

"vanessa, stay still." brooke begged, as she painted the other girl's toenails.

"sorry, it tickles." vanessa told her, as she let out a giggle.

brooke glanced up at vanessa, and she couldn't help but think she looked adorable, wearing the pink hoodie she had borrowed a few days ago. she had her hands rested on her knees and was watching brooke intently, finding it adorable how she'd occasionally stick out her tongue, in concentration.

"you're cute, baby." vanessa told her sweetly.

brooke flashed her a smile, and continued painting her toes a cute baby pink colour. the didn't say much for a little while, but the silence was comfortable - they were there with one another, that was enough.

it was ten minutes later, face masks were off and vanessa's nails had finished drying, when she had the genius idea for them to smoke a blunt together. she grabbed her small stash from underneath her bed, and started rolling a blunt for them to smoke.

"how you feeling, boo, after what went down with yvie?" vanessa asked, as she took a hit, after lighting the blunt.

"i'm okay, i guess. i don't care anymore, they can all think what they wanna think."

everybody had their opinions about their relationship, and brooke was sick of it. they were all so entitled, thinking that what they thought about them being together could change anything. brooke loved vanessa with her entire being, nobody could change the way she felt towards her.

vanessa had a coy smile on her face, as she handed the blunt to brooke. she didn't care about anybody else's opinions either, and it was nice to know that they were both on the same page.

they were about twenty minutes into their smoke session, and they were already both quite high. they were having a deep, meaningful conversation and they were enjoying getting to know one another more.

they already knew quite a lot about each other, but their relationship was still so fresh and new - there was still so much to learn.

"babe, i wanna know about your first kiss." vanessa prompted.

"so i was fourteen, and me and my friends had went to watch a movie. there was this one guy called jake, and we were sat next to each other in the cinema, and he was like "what would you do if i kissed you right now?" and i was like really surprised he asked me that so i said "i don't know" and then he kissed me."

"was it good?" vanessa asked.

"it was okay, i guess."

"was the guy cute?"

"yeah, kinda." brooke thought back for a second. "how was your first kiss?"

"i had just turned fourteen and i was with the girls and we were hanging out in this park, right? there was a few guys there too, and a'keria had been telling me that this guy called matt had a crush on me. so anyways, we were sat on like - you know the thing you climb on - and we were talking and i always found him cute so i kissed him."

"did he kiss back?"

"of course he did."

brooke giggled at vanessa's response, she couldn't help but love how cocky she sounded in that moment.

"baby, i wanna know something juicy." vanessa announced, a moment or two later.

and brooke couldn't help but feel intrigued by the word 'juicy'. she had a feeling about where this was going.

"what do you wanna know?"

vanessa thought to herself for a moment, and brooke could tell that she had so many questions that she would like to ask her, and she knew most of them were dirty in one way or another.

"tell me about your first time with a girl." vanessa prompted, as she rolled another blunt.

"it was about a month, maybe a month and a half after me and carter broke up, which i know sounds quick but i really wanted to see what it was like with another girl. i was like ninety-nine percent sure i was bi but in my head i was like how am i gonna know for certain if i don't sleep with another girl, you know?"

vanessa nodded, knowing exactly what brooke meant about that feeling of uncertainty.

"there was this girl in my biology class, and she had always been so open about liking girls and i really admired that, i guess. we had always gotten along, and after the breakup we started talking more. one night we were at a party, i was a little drunk and so was she. we kissed, a few times actually, and i ended up going back to her place."

"what happened then?" vanessa asked, smirking.

"we fucked." brooke said, causing vanessa to let out a brash laugh at her bluntness. "i don't know what you want me to say." brooke giggled.

"did you enjoy it?" vanessa asked after a moment, trying to get more out of the blonde.

"yeah, i did." brooke replied simply. "is there anything else you want to know?"

"actually yes _mami,_ there's a lot i want to know."

and so vanessa continued to ask her questions, and brooke continued to answer all of them.

///

it was a couple hours later, the weed had worn off and vanessa was deep in thought. she had been thinking a lot recently about her past, about how things were before she met brooke and she decided she needed to open up a few things.

"babe, can i please ... uh ... talk to you about something?" vanessa managed to get out.

"of course, what is it, love?"

brooke grabbed vanessa's hand. she could tell that whatever was on her mind was making her nervous, and she wanted to do whatever she could to make her feel at ease.

"i kinda just wanted to ... open up ... about a few things." she started.

so many thoughts were racing through her mind, and so it was hard for her to try and keep it all together. she didn't know how to say the things she needed to say.

"just take your time, baby."

vanessa takes a moment as she tries to collect her thoughts before starting to speak up about what had been on her mind.

"i know that i don't talk a lot about my family or like stuff from when i was a kid. i try to block it all out, because i really do hate even thinking about all of it. it's just a bit of a sucky situation, my dad left when i was nine and i haven't seen him since. when he was around, he and my mom would argue a lot. it never got like physically abusive, and if it did i never saw any of that but they'd argue most days and i think it kinda fucked with me, being around all of that. when my dad left, things just got worse. my mom started working more shifts at her job, and whenever she wasn't working she'd be drinking. she'd get angry with me whenever she got too drunk, and it got to the point where i just hated being home when she was there."

vanessa took a pause for a moment, tears were threatening to fall and she didn't want to be this vulnerable again, but she needed to share this side of her with brooke. she needed to be honest about her past.

"i've always felt unloved, i guess, and it fucking sucks knowing that my parents - the people that brought me into this fucking world - don't care about me. there's just always been this part of me that hasn't understood what it's like to have someone love you. and i think that's why for a while i was dating and hooking up with a bunch of people - i wanted to feel something. i just so desperately wanted to feel loved."

brooke's heart felt heavy as vanessa told her all of this. she cared for this girl a lot, probably more than she had cared for anybody in her life and hearing her talk about her family and her life at home - it broke her heart.

brooke held her in her arms as she cried, she knew things were getting too much for her and that she needed to let it all out. she stayed there, holding her close, wanting to make all of her pain go away.

"baby, it's okay. i've got you." she soothed.

vanessa clung onto brooke, her body shaking as she cried. she felt safe in her arms, like her presence alone could make everything okay again.

///

it was twenty minutes later, vanessa had finished crying and they were both cuddled up on the bed. brooke knew that whenever vanessa was having a bad day or feeling upset she would want lots of hugs and affection, and she was more than happy to give her that.

"babe, can you stay tonight? i just ... i don't want to be alone tonight." vanessa asked.

"of course, baby. i'm not leaving you alone tonight." brooke agreed, without a second thought.

"thank you, brooke - for everything."

she meant it too. she knew how lucky she was to have brooke in her life. somehow she always knew what to do in these situations, she knew how to calm her down and make her feel like everything was going to be alright.

"it's okay, baby." brooke smiled.

the rest of the night was spent watching netflix, whilst brooke showed vanessa some love and affection, which admittedly made her feel a lot better.

after watching netflix for a little while, they decided to get ready for bed and get under the covers. vanessa snuggled into brooke, wrapping an arm around her waist before pressing a kiss to the her lips.

"i love you." vanessa told her, meaning it with her entire being.

god, she adored her.

"i love you too."

in that moment it was very clear to her, she had never known what being loved felt like until she met brooke lynn hytes.

**_"maybe home is nothing but two arms holding you tight when you're at your worst"_ **


	14. part thirteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey ya'll,
> 
> so this is the last chapter before i start posting brand new ones. also want to say i am kinda proud of this chapter ? like for real ? wild, i know. 
> 
> i just want to say thank you for the lovely comments and kudos and for giving this fic a chance, i really appreciate it <3 
> 
> the next chapter should be hopefully up in the next few days so be on the lookout for an update :)
> 
> \- chloe

the next week went by smoothly. their relationship was going strong, and they seemed to be closer than ever after vanessa had shared such a big part of life with brooke.

they were spending pretty much every waking moment with one another, which wasn't anything new but still. vanessa could feel herself getting attached to brooke, which made sense - the two were dating after all, had been close for a while now - but something in her knew that being attached to somebody like this wasn't exactly healthy. she tried to shake that feeling off, she would deal with that thought some other time. she wanted to enjoy this happiness, she wanted to bask in it. she hadn't felt like this in a while, what was the harm in indulging in it a little?

it was the middle of april now, meaning brooke had been a part of vanessa's life now for almost three months, which quite frankly vanessa could not believe. in a weird way, she felt like she had always known brooke, like there wasn't a point when they hadn't known one another. undeniably, they had grown close extremely fast, which perhaps was why she had this feeling that brooke had been in her life forever - she had so much trust in her and it was scary in a way. but again, she was trying to keep those intrusive thoughts at bay.

it was the thursday before spring break. brooke was at her locker with nina, and the two were talking, whilst brooke waited for vanessa to come meet her at her locker.

vanessa got to brooke's locker around five minutes later. she wrapped an arm around brooke's waist, cuddling into her slightly, as she greeted both of them.

she was glad to see her girl again, they couldn't hang out the night before since she was babysitting to earn a little money, so needless to say she missed brooke a lot.

"hey, vanjie! brooke here was just telling me about how she was missing you last night." nina informed vanessa, a grin on her face.

nina loved vanessa and brooke together. she was great friends with both of them, and she had secretly (or not so secretly) been rooting for them from the beginning. it made her happy to see two of her best friends so happy with one another, she felt content knowing vanessa was finally getting the love she deserved.

"aww, you missed me?" vanessa asked, a smug look on her face, as she gazed up at her girlfriend.

"shut up." brooke retorted, her cheeks blushing a soft shade of pink.

"i missed you too, boo." vanessa told her, pressing another kiss to her lips before making conversation with nina.

///

it was lunch time and they were all sat on the grass near the tennis courts. vanessa was sat beside brooke like always, slightly cuddled in to her side too. the group were talking about their plans for spring break, and it all began with a party on saturday night at aquaria's house.

the couple had also decided that they were going to spend practically every day with one another, which again was nothing new but they both figured it would be nice to spend more time together during spring break.

they were about fifteen minutes into lunchtime when yvie decided to come over to the group with scarlet.

"brooke, can i talk to you, like in private?" yvie asked, and for once she looked slightly shaken.

"whatever you have to say you can say it front of v and everybody else."

brooke realised this would be about their argument that took place a couple weeks back. it also crossed her mind that yvie probably thought vanessa didn't know about their argument, which was kinda ridiculous considering the fact they were dating and of course she would tell her about their fight - especially when it did involve vanessa.

"no, i can't, i need to speak to you in private, brooke." yvie told her, sounding desperate in a way.

"look, if this is about yall's argument, i know what you said, yvie." vanessa chimed in.

yvie looked somewhat mortified, like she had no idea that vanessa knew about their argument - brooke was right in assuming that was the case. she didn't reply to vanessa's comment for a moment or two, maybe out of shock but who could really know.

"all i wanted to say was i'm sorry for what i said, i just don't really agree with your relationship and i figured i should voice that." yvie finally said.

brooke could not believe what she was hearing in that moment. yvie was 'apologising' yet it really was not an apology at all. it was half-assed and really just seemed like she wanted to start another fight. why would she think that repeating the fact she didn't agree with their relationship was a good idea? it was none of yvie's business, she didn't understand why that wasn't already clear.

"i don't wanna hear it, if you're gonna be like that." brooke told her, her voice a little cold, but only because she was hurt.

"but brooke i just - "

"yvie just leave it." nina suggested.

nina was aware of their fight, and she knew how brooke and vanessa felt about people inserting their unwanted opinions. and she knew it would be best if yvie just left them alone.

yvie stood there for a moment, wanting to say something more, but ultimately decided to just let it go when scarlet grabbed her hand, pulling her away.

"i'm sorry, guys." scarlet mouthed to brooke and vanessa, as they walked off from the group.

scarlet was extremely supportive of the two, unlike her girlfriend. and so maybe she would try and make yvie apologise again, for real, sometime. maybe somehow she'd convince her to just keep her mouth shut and leave them alone.

vanessa turned to brooke, and something in her just knew how hurt brooke was over the drama with yvie. she knew how close they had gotten, and she knew it must suck being in that position where someone close to you doesn't accept your relationship. she wrapped her arms around brooke's neck, hugging her tightly.

"i'm sorry, baby." vanessa whispered into her ear, rubbing her back.

"it's okay." brooke said, easing into her arms.

vanessa stayed there for a moment longer, holding brooke, before pulling away and looking at her girlfriend. her eyes scanned over her face, searching to see if she was okay. she had that brave face on again - the one she always seems to wear. but vanessa saw through that, at least she did in that moment, and she knew brooke was hurt over this.

"we'll talk about this later, if you want, okay?" vanessa suggested, a reassuring smile on her face.

brooke nodded, and vanessa pressed a kiss to her forehead, before trying to join back in with the group's conversation - but really in the back of her mind she was thinking about brooke and how yvie had just treated her.

///

it was 4pm and they were up in vanessa's bedroom, brooke was sat on the bed and vanessa was getting changed into some comfy clothes. she put on some grey shorts and an oversized white hoodie. and when she was finished she made her way over to where brooke was sitting on the bed.

"you okay, baby?" vanessa asked her, as she sat down beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulder.

brooke nodded, as vanessa intertwined their fingers, before beginning to speak.

"i'm just kinda mad at her, but also kinda hurt, i guess. i know this is probably really stupid but me and her became, like, really good friends and it's annoying me that she can't even pretend to be happy for us. i'm just so sick of it." brooke told her, she sounded done in a way, like maybe she was over this bullshit.

"it's not stupid, baby. ya'll were close, so i get why you're hurt." vanessa replied, and brooke could hear the sincerity in her voice, like all she wanted was to comfort brooke and show her that she understood.

brooke nodded in reply, and vanessa pressed another kiss to her forehead, like she had done that lunchtime. they sat in silence for a moment or two, and vanessa could sense brooke thinking about all of this.

"baby, don't stress over it. i know it's hard, but i'm here, okay? and if you want i can try and help take your mind off of everything." vanessa offered.

"yeah, i'd like that." brooke replied.

she did just want to try and forget all the drama. she was angry and hurt still, of course, but she knew it wasn't good holding onto all of that.

"what do you wanna do then, babe?" vanessa asked, moving to face brooke, placing her hands on her legs.

vanessa had ideas of her own, but she wanted to know what brooke wanted to do. she had been having a pretty rough day and vanessa wanted to do whatever would help relax her.

"you, if you're down." brooke grinned, playing with vanessa's hair.

vanessa was speechless.

"babe," she could not find the words. "that was so smooth."

brooke let out a giggle, and vanessa leaned into her slightly, placing a hand on the side of her neck.

"i'm down." vanessa finally responded to her proposition.

"yeah?" brooke checked, just to be sure.

vanessa nodded, before placing her lips on top of brooke's, and kissing her. brooke pulled her into her lap, her hands resting on her hips, as vanessa got herself comfortable, each leg on either side of brooke's.

they broke the kiss for a second, so that vanessa could take off her hoodie. and brooke took this moment to admire her girlfriend and her amazing body, she always looked so good sat in her lap like this and she wanted to appreciate that for a minute.

brooke pressed her lips to vanessa's neck, brushing them over her skin, before sucking gently. vanessa tilts her head backwards, giving brooke better access to kiss and suck as she pleased. brooke's hands gripped vanessa's hips, pulling her body closer to own, as if they weren't already close enough. they kept on making out, vanessa's hands moved down brooke's body, touching her breasts through her white t-shirt, giving them a gentle squeeze. her hands moved further down her body, her fingers playing with the bottom of brooke's t-shirt, wanting for her take it off. brooke moved her lips away from vanessa's neck, so that she could take off her top.

"you're hot, _mami_." vanessa tells her, before pulling her in for another kiss.

brooke's hands moved to vanessa's inner thighs, massaging them gently, knowing that it never failed to turn her on. she moved them higher up vanessa's thighs, causing the brunette to fidget slightly in her lap.

"you wanna take these off for me, babe?" brooke asked, her fingers dipping into the waistband of vanessa's shorts.

vanessa nodded with an eager smile, before sitting up from brooke's lap so that it was easier for her to take off her shorts.

brooke's eyes trailed up and down vanessa's body. she was sat in front of brooke, on her knees, her legs spread slightly. she still had on her bra, that was in a pink lace material, and her panties, and brooke couldn't help but think she looked so fucking hot. she couldn't believe that she was her girlfriend, that she was all hers.

brooke placed her hand on the side of vanessa's neck, knowing that the other girl always found it hot when she would do that. she sat up slightly, pressing her lips to vanessa's, before pushing her down on to the bed.

"fuck, i want you so bad." vanessa said, looking up at brooke, noticing how good she looked on top of her.

brooke smirked in response, admiring the sight of the girl half naked beneath her. brooke leaned in for another kiss, and vanessa's hands on her hips pulled her closer. they made out for a few moments, until vanessa wanted more, she wanted brooke to get out of her jeans. she unzipped them. brooke pulled away from the kiss, allowing herself to strip from the denim fabric, that right now was only in the way. when she was done, she began kissing vanessa's neck once more, planting kisses all the way down to where her bra covered her breasts. vanessa took off her own bra, knowing brooke would want to see them, and touch them.

she took one nipple into her mouth, her tongue swirling around it gently, knowing how sensitive vanessa was. she continued doing what she was doing, causing vanessa to let out small and quiet gasps and moans. brooke loved the noises vanessa would make, it encouraged her to keep making her girl feel good, and that was possibly one of her favourite things ever. she loved watching vanessa come apart beneath her, and this was just the beginning.

she slipped a hand in between them, between vanessa's thighs and she could feel how soaked she already was, through her cotton panties.

"you're so wet for me, ness." brooke cooed, as she stroked her through the thin fabric.

vanessa whined, she needed brooke, and god, it was so embarrassing. but she was only human.

"please, brooke, stop teasing." vanessa pleaded.

and so brooke decided to give vanessa what she wanted.

she slipped off her panties, and rubbed her entrance slowly, causing vanessa to gasp. she worked two fingers inside of her, watching as vanessa's eyelids fluttered shut. she pumped her fingers in and out, finding a rhythm pretty quickly. vanessa moaned softly, letting brooke know that she liked what she was doing.

"feels good." vanessa breathed out, as brooke continued to finger her.

"i'm glad, baby."

brooke kept on going. after a while, she moved her fingers towards her clit, drawing circles with the pads of her fingers, rubbing her with just the right amount of pressure.

brooke watched her as she fucked her. and she couldn't help but think that vanessa looked so good like this, her body was glistening from sweating just a little, her lips were pink and slightly swollen from all of the kissing and she was making the most sinful noises.

it didn't take too long for vanessa to reach her climax, as she came all over brooke's fingers. the blonde worked her through her orgasm, vanessa's body shaking as she called out brooke's name.

///

the two kept on going for a while longer. brooke had made vanessa come three times, and vanessa had made her come just as many. maybe it was excessive, but they just loved having sex with one another. there was no shame in that.

they showered once they were finished, and cleaned up vanessa's sheets since they were dirty from everything they had been doing on them.

///

vanessa dropped brooke home at around half eight that night. she walked her to her front door, pulling her in for another kiss before saying goodnight to her girlfriend. she drove home, and she felt content. everything was going so well and she was so unbelievably grateful for that.

brooke greeted her parents, telling them she had been hanging out with vanessa and doing 'homework' which was half true - she had been with vanessa ever since school finished. however the second part was absolutely not true, they were not doing homework, that was the last thing on both of their minds.

later that night, when she was all cosied up in bed she thought about vanessa. she never seemed to leave her mind, she wasn't complaining - there were worse things to think about after all.

but she just kept thinking about her; her laugh, her smile, how she knew all the words to nearly every lana del rey song, the way she treated those around her, how her eyes would light up when she'd talk about something she loved. everything about her was perfect. she radiated so much light, despite knowing so much darkness, and in that moment it became abundantly clear to brooke she had never loved somebody as much as she loved vanessa mateo.

_**"but i love you so much more than just to the moon and back"** _


	15. part fourteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello ya’ll
> 
> i hope u guys are staying safe and are doing ok. here is a new chapter, honestly it’s kinda all over the place but it is quite an important chapter in some ways. i hope u all enjoy, let me know what you think in the comments if you would like <3
> 
> \- chloe

it was friday, the last day of term before spring break, and vanessa was excited because one) it meant no school for a week, obviously, but two) she got to spend more time with brooke and really she could not wait.

everyone was in high spirits by lunch time, all ecstatic to have no school for an entire week. they were sat on the outdoor benches, vanessa right by brooke's side, just like always. brooke had her arm wrapped around vanessa's shoulders, as they all talked about their plans for the week ahead.

"do you wanna do something fun tonight?" vanessa asked, turning brooke's attention away from the rest of the group.

"like what?" brooke replied, a smile on her face as she thought about the fact she would be spending so much time with her girl.

"i don't mind, babe." vanessa told her. "maybe go to the beach, get some taco bell and then you could spend the night." she suggested, a moment or two later.

"i like the sound of that." brooke said, giving vanessa a quick kiss, before they both joined back in with the group's conversation.

///

it was the end of the school day, and vanessa was at brooke's locker, waiting for her to grab her things so they could leave.

they had driven to school by themselves that morning so they decided they were each going back to their houses (brooke had to grab some pyjamas and a change of clothes anyways since she was staying the night) and then vanessa would pick her up in about an hour so they could spend the rest of the day - and night - with one another.

"see you soon, babe." vanessa chirped, giving brooke a kiss before getting into her car.

"drive safe, v."

"you too, brooke."

brooke walked over to her own car, before getting in and driving home.

when she got there, her mom's car was parked out front, meaning she must have gotten home from work early. brooke headed inside, and she could hear her mom calling from the kitchen, so she went to go see her.

"hello, darling. how was school?" she asked her daughter.

"it was okay, yeah." brooke replied.

"that's good, honey. are you still staying at vanessa's tonight?" brooke had sent her a text at lunch time asking her if it was alright.

"yeah, she's picking me up in like an hour-ish, we're going to the beach and grabbing some food before we go back to hers." brooke explained.

"that sounds nice. how's vanessa doing?" her mom asked.

"she's good, mom."

"i'm glad. i really like vanessa, she seems like an amazing friend, brooke. you're lucky to have her." her mom said sincerely, and it made brooke very happy to know that that she liked her.

of course neither her mom nor her dad knew that the two were dating just yet, but it did feel good to know they approved of her being a part of her life, even if they didn't exactly know the full extent. she wanted to talk to vanessa first about telling her parents because she knew it could go one of two ways. either they'd get mad about the fact that she still liked girls - they had always believed that it was just a phase or that she was confused - or somehow they would have come to terms with all of this and accept their relationship for what it is. she didn't want her parents getting mad at vanessa because their daughter was dating a girl, so she needed to discuss all of this with her, to make sure she was okay with her parents knowing about the two of them.

"i know i am." brooke agreed - she was extremely lucky to have vanessa in her life, nevermind have her as a girlfriend.

///

it was just over an hour later when vanessa arrived at brooke's house to pick her up. she knocked on the front door, letting brooke know that she was here. a moment or so later, brooke's mom opened the door, inviting vanessa in.

"it's so nice to see you, honey." she told her, pulling her into a comforting, warm hug.

"you too, mrs hytes." vanessa said, politely.

"vanessa, what have i told you? just call me nicole." she insisted, with a kind smile. her eyes were kind too.

vanessa nodded, smiling back at her girlfriend's mom. she liked brooke's family a lot, they always made her feel welcome and at home. and she appreciated that greatly. most of the time she felt like they cared about her more than her own family did.

a moment or two later, brooke came walking down the stairs, her bag over her shoulder. she gave vanessa a hug, and they talked with her mom for another five minutes before leaving her house and getting into vanessa's car.

"so, where you wanna, go babe?" vanessa asked, looking over at brooke who was in her passenger seat.

"i'm kinda hungry." brooke told her.

"yeah same, you wanna head to taco bell or ... where do you want to eat?"

"i don't mind, taco bell's good."

and so that's where vanessa drove them to.

///

they were sat in taco bell, in a corner near the back of the restaurant. they had just gotten their food and were having a conversation.

"my mom really likes you, you know?" brooke told vanessa.

"yeah?" vanessa asked, a little quietly. she was anxious about what brooke's parents thought of her.

brooke could tell that her mother liked vanessa a lot, she always asked about her and had made it clear that she was allowed over any time she liked. and whenever vanessa would come over, her mom always welcomed her with open arms, making sure that the girl felt right at home.

"yeah." brooke nodded, a smile on her face.

"that makes me happy, babe. i keep getting scared, thinking that you're parents don't like me very much." vanessa admitted.

"vanessa, they adore you, honestly." brooke told her, grabbing her hand from across the table, giving it a squeeze to reassure her.

vanessa just smiled, trusting brooke's words.

///

it was 6pm, vanessa had just parked up her car, in the parking lot nearby. they were walking down to the beach, hand in hand, and they both felt a sense of peace and happiness being there with one another.

they walked along the beach, near where the ocean was coming in, almost touching them. they held hands, like always, never caring what other people would think. nothing else mattered outside of their relationship, not really.

they talked too, about lots of different things. brooke told vanessa more about her life back in canada. she hadn't spoken about it much recently, possibly because the life she was living now was so much better than she could have ever imagined it being when she was stuck back in toronto. and vanessa told brooke about the people she had been dating before her, but only because brooke was dying to know about all of that. she wanted to know if vanessa had a type, and maybe she did.

"babe, i wanna talk to you about something." brooke said, grabbing both of vanessa's hands, stopping her in her tracks, causing them both to stand still.

"yes, what is it?" vanessa asked, moving her hands onto brooke's waist for a brief moment.

"do you think we should tell my parents about us?" it had been lingering on brooke's mind for a while now.

vanessa thought for a moment, she didn't know what to say. she knew brooke's family hadn't exactly been supportive when she came out to them as bisexual, not long before she moved to california. and she knew that because of that brooke was scared to let them know that she was dating a girl. vanessa just wanted to do whatever brooke felt comfortable with.

"it's up to you, baby. what do you wanna do?" vanessa's voice was soothing, as she grabbed brooke's hand, squeezing it gently to show her support.

"i ... i think i'm ready to tell them about us, but i'm scared, vanessa. like i think ... i hope that they'll be okay and accept us, but i just get scared." brooke confessed, and in that moment vanessa saw a completely different side to brooke.

in that moment brooke seemed vulnerable, something vanessa had never really seen in her before. she always seemed confident, and like she had everything together, but vanessa could tell that the blonde was anxious and afraid.

"i understand, baby." vanessa said softly. "it's okay to be scared, i get it. i'm happy with whatever you want to do, okay?"

brooke just nodded.

"i can see you overthinking things." vanessa told her gently, moving slightly closer to the girl in front of her.

"yeah." brooke sighed. "i just don't want this to ruin things between us."

"what do you mean?" vanessa asked, trying to gain a better understanding of what brooke was telling her.

"i'm scared that if we tell my parents, they won't accept us and then it'll slowly ruin things between us. i don't want to lose you, vanessa." her voice was shaky, and vanessa could feel her heart break.

she had never seen brooke be vulnerable like this before, but something in her just knew that she had been putting up a front her entire life. there was more to brooke than this wall that she had been putting up, she just knew. call it a gut feeling.

"baby, you're not going to lose me." vanessa wrapped her arms around brooke, pulling her in closer, wanting to keep her safe. "i promise you."

///

they decided to head back to vanessa's house not long after that conversation. at some point during the car ride brooke apologised - even though she had absolutely nothing to apologise for, of course - saying she had ruined their afternoon.

"baby, you haven't ruined anything." vanessa told her, grabbing brooke's hand in an attempt to reassure her that everything was fine. she hadn't done anything wrong. "i know you're scared, and you keep thinking about everything, but i'm here for you, babe. we'll figure something out."

brooke nodded, as she held vanessa's hand tighter. she was quiet for a moment or two, too busy being in her own head. she was just scared about all of this. she wanted to be able to no longer hide her and vanessa's relationship, she wanted to be more open with her parents, but most of all she just wanted for them to accept her. she didn't know how much longer she could live with the idea that she had let them down - even if it was over something she couldn't control.

brooke was snapped out of her thoughts when vanessa started singing along to the music that was playing on her phone.

" _it's you, it's you, it's all for you. everything i do. i tell you all the time heaven is a place on earth with you. tell me all the things you wanna do. i heard that you like the bad girls, honey, is that true? it's better than i ever even knew. they say that the world was built for two, only worth living if somebody is loving you, and baby, now you do."_

she was singing along to video games, which she would often play whenever she was driving. it was one of her favourite songs, it just felt so nostalgic - she knew brooke loved it too.

brooke watched as she sang, and she couldn't help but admire how gorgeous and angelic she looked. she was singing pretty quietly, only loud enough so that brooke could hear. it was moments like this, moments that were so unspeakably perfect, that made brooke realise she was going to be okay. she had vanessa, everything was going to be just fine, or at least that's what she told herself.

///

it was 9pm. they were in their pyjamas, up in vanessa's bedroom, sat on the floor as they watched some crappy reality show that was playing on the tv. they weren't paying that much attention though, they were too busy focusing on one another.

"how are you, baby?" vanessa asked the blonde, moving so that she was facing her, their bodies close.

"i'm okay, yeah." brooke said, avoiding eye contact.

"hey, baby, look at me. what's wrong?" she grabbed brooke's hand.

"nothing." maybe she was lying, but she didn't want to do this, she didn't want vanessa to worry about her.

she didn't even know why she was freaking out about all of this - yes, it was scary the idea of them telling her parents about their relationship but why was this affecting her so much, especially when everything else was going so well? she had been having a really nice time with vanessa, before bringing up the subject of her parents, and earlier that day she had a nice moment with her mom, a one that meant a lot to her. she had been doing good for a while now, ever since she started getting close to vanessa. sure a few things had happened that were less than ideal, that could have potentially messed with their relationship - the situation with blair, how silky had been with vanessa, her falling out with yvie, but besides from that everything was so good. almost too good it seemed. why did it feel like everything was about to go downhill? why did it feel like she was going to go back to that dark place, the one she had worked so hard to get out of?

"you can talk to me, brooke lynn, you know that right?"

brooke nodded, putting a small smile on her face to try and prove to vanessa that she was okay. she didn't want to talk about her feelings, not tonight. maybe not ever.

vanessa embraced brooke, her arms around her shoulders, keeping their bodies close. brooke's hands had found their way to vanessa's waist, as she breathed in her scent, which seemed to calm her down. it seemed to ground her. she was here with her girlfriend, the person who she trusted the most in this world. and although it had been another tough day (she seemed to be having a few of those recently) she was safe now. she and vanessa were holding each other close, everything was okay. nothing mattered outside of this room, they had one another, that was enough.

_**”the little things? the little moments? - they aren’t little.”** _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i always leave a lil quote at the end of each chapter, this one doesn’t really say a lot about the chapter, it kinda does ? but not majorly, but it kinda sums up how i’m feeling right now, little moments really are so important <3
> 
> hope u enjoyed


	16. part fifteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so first of all i want to say that i know i haven’t been consistent recently but i really am i working on it, i want to post more and i’m determined to get more updates out :) second of all i hope u are all staying safe <3 
> 
> shit goes down in this chapter, there’s drama so i hope u will all like that ... hopefully idk
> 
> anyways let me know your thoughts :)

vanessa was the first to wake up on saturday morning, her arms were around brooke's waist, keeping her body close to her own. she watched as brooke slept, noticing how peaceful she looked laying there, cuddled into her.

vanessa stayed there for a while, holding her and cuddling her, not wanting to wake her up. she looked adorable when she slept. vanessa didn't want to disturb her.

but it wasn't that much longer when brooke woke up, her eyes fluttering open, realising where she was - safe, snuggled up in vanessa's bed. a smile appeared on her face, seeing her girlfriend laying there next to her.

"g'morning, gorgeous." vanessa spoke, her voice still a little raspy since she had woke up not too long ago.

"morning, baby." brooke replied, pulling vanessa closer as she spoke. "how long you been awake?"

"not long." she said simply.

"have you been watching me while i sleep?" brooke teased knowingly, a smirk on her face.

"maybe, but you're just so fucking cute so can you blame me?"

brooke rolled her eyes playfully before pressing a kiss to her lips, her hands on vanessa's hips, keeping her body close. they stayed in bed for a little while, just cuddling and exchanging kisses, talking too but mostly just enjoying being there with one another.

///

brooke went home at around 1pm, after spending her morning with vanessa. they had been cuddling and making out, vanessa wanted to show brooke some extra love and affection since she knew she hadn't been feeling the greatest the night before - she was in her head about telling her parents, she was scared. and so vanessa decided she wanted to give brooke her full attention, try and distract her from her thoughts.

when brooke got home she went straight up to her room, and laid down onto her bed. it felt like something was weighing down on her, and she didn't like it one bit. everything had been going well in her life recently, but something felt off and that scared her. she didn't want to go downhill again, she didn't want to feel the way she felt back in canada.

she tried to ignore those feelings though, she hoped maybe if she ignored them they were just go away on their own.

she had been lying on her bed for a while now, just staring up at the ceiling when she heard a knock at her bedroom door.

"come in." she shouted out.

it was her mom.

"how was your night?" she asked brooke.

"it was good, yeah." brooke replied, not wanting to say too much.

"yeah? that's good, darling, i'm glad. so what are you doing tonight, thought we could maybe order some pizza, have some family time?"

"i'm sorry, mom but aquaria invited me and some of the girls over to her house for a sleepover, and i promised them i would go." okay, maybe that was a lie, but she wasn't going to tell her mom that she was going to a party and that she was going to get drunk out of her mind, now was she?

"that's okay, we can always do it some other time. hope you have fun with your friends, sweetheart." her mom said with a smile, before leaving her room.

brooke lay back down on her bed, sighing, before grabbing her phone and pressing the home button, when she noticed a message from vanessa.

 **vanessa** : _hey boo, just checking ur okay. miss your ass already <3_

 **brooke** : _babe i saw u literally an hour and a half ago_

 **vanessa** : _ik but i feel weird when ur not here with me_

 **brooke** : _i get u, i feel the same ness_

 **vanessa** : _u okay babe?_

 **brooke** : _yeah i'm fine_

 **vanessa** : _i can feel u lying_

 **brooke** : _what over text?_

 **vanessa** : _yes mami i can_

 **brooke** : _i'll tell u later maybe ok?_

 **vanessa** : _whenever ur ready baby i'm here_

 **brooke** : _thank u, i love you vanessa you know that right?_

 **vanessa** : _i do, i love you too brooke <3_

///

it was around 7:30pm, and brooke had just arrived at aquaria's house, where the party was taking place that night. she paid the uber driver, before getting out of the car and walking up to the large and expensive-looking house. she was greeted by a few friends as she headed inside, who all complimented how good she looked in her tight black dress, with her blonde hair cascading down her back. she began talking with aquaria and brianna, as well as a couple other people she didn't know too well. they had been talking for a little while, when she felt an arm wrap around her waist.

"hey, babe." it was vanessa.

brooke couldn't help but notice how gorgeous, and hot she looked. her brown hair was straightened and she was wearing a dangerously short white skirt as well as a crop top to match. the outfit was revealing, and it showed off a lot of skin, and she loved it. vanessa was so ridiculously hot and it never ceased to amaze her that this girl was her _girlfriend_.

"hey." brooke replied. "you look so fucking hot." she whispered, so that only vanessa could hear.

vanessa smiled, pretty pleased with herself - she knew she looked good tonight, but seeing the look on brooke's face confirmed that. it was obvious she was checking her out, the blonde wasn't being subtle about it whatsoever.

"so do you, babe." vanessa told her, giving brooke a side hug, resting her head on her chest for a brief moment.

they continued talking with the group for another five minutes or so before brooke decided to get herself a drink. she had already taken a couple of shots and was already feeling a little tipsy, but this was a party and she didn't see the harm in drinking a little more. she wanted to have some fun tonight.

she was in the kitchen, which was a pretty quiet spot compared to everywhere else in the house, pouring herself a vodka and coke when plastique came over to her.

"hey, brooke." plastique exclaimed, as she walked closer to brooke.

"hi, plastique." brooke replied.

the two started talking, although it wasn't about anything exciting or important, but at some point during their conversation things seem to change and take a different turn.

"so how are you and vanessa? you guys still dating?" plastique asked, and something about her tone just seemed off.

brooke was a little confused by her choice of wording for the last question but she answered her anyway.

"we're really good, yeah." brooke told her. she meant it too.

plastique didn't say anything for a moment, she just nodded in reply. and something about her mood, her tone, just shifted, like something had switched in her.

"look i don't mean to pry, i just don't think she's the kind of girl you need in your life. i think you could do way better, brooke." plastique spoke, moving slightly closer to the girl in front of her. "you deserve somebody who has their shit together, i know vanessa's pretty and funny and ... whatever, but she's a mess."

plastique calling vanessa a mess - it didn't sit right with brooke. she knew how much vanessa had been through, how she had been hurt time and time again by the people who are supposed to love her. she wasn't a mess, she was broken and she was trying to survive and find happiness just like everybody else.

she didn't understand why plastique was saying any of this, either. it was clear to anybody that she and vanessa were so happy together, and they had a lot of love for one another. why would she want to throw all of that away?

"we'd be good together, don't you think?" plastique grabbed one of brooke's hands, as she tried to intertwine their fingers. "i could make you so happy, brooke."

plastique moved even closer to brooke, invading her space as she became increasingly more uncomfortable.

"plastique, no, i have a girlfriend." brooke remindedher.

"break up with her then." in that moment it became apparent that plastique was extremely drunk.

"what? no, oh my god. have you heard yourself?" she was still calm and acting cordial, she didn't want to hurt her feelings despite the awful way she was acting.

plastique was still her friend. she was drunk and saying some things brooke was sure she would come to regret. maybe she was having a bad night, maybe alcohol brought out the worst in her, at least that's what brooke was trying to tell herself.

"you could do so much better than that slut."

and that's when brooke could not take her shit one second longer.

"don't fucking call her that!"

"i'm sorry, i didn't mean that." she was slurring her words, and grabbing on to brooke's arm, trying to keep her there.

"don't touch me."

she moved away from plastique's grip, leaving her alone in the kitchen. she gulped down her drink, grimacing as the liquid burned her throat. she couldn't believe what had just happened. she was in shock. and she wanted to forget about it. but she knew that wasn't an option. she needed to talk to vanessa.

///

vanessa was in the living room, sat beside monet and monique who were currently drunkenly singing along to whatever pop song that was playing through the speakers. she was over this party, she thought it would be fun, thought she'd get to make out with her girl, get to dance with her too. instead she was sat here feeling alone, despite being surrounded by so many people. none of those people mattered right now, she just wanted brooke.

she got up from where she was sitting, and went into the kitchen to grab herself another drink. she poured herself some malibu, and began drinking it, when she noticed plastique sat at the kitchen counter.

"hey, plastique, have you seen brooke?" vanessa asked, a little brashly.

plastique just shrugged.

"what's up, sis?"

despite the fact that vanessa was convinced the girl had a crush on brooke, she was still going to try to be friendly with her. there was no need for her to treat plastique like shit because of her insecurities, or because she thought that she had a crush on her girlfriend. there was still that possibility that she was just being crazy, making a big deal out of nothing.

"i don't know, ask your girlfriend." she sounded done, and tired, like something was up with her.

vanessa was confused for a second. she didn't know what to make of what she was saying. but then it hit her, something was wrong, something had happened between the two.

"what the fuck happened?" vanessa asked, speaking louder than she was before.

"like i said, go talk to your girlfriend." plastique said.

///

vanessa found brooke outside in the garden. she was sat with nina on the loungers near the pool. vanessa made her way over to brooke, and she was nervous, maybe even scared. she didn't want to believe that something had been going on between her and plastique, but after being hurt and cheated on so many times that was where her mind went with what plastique had said to her.

"hey, can i talk to you?" vanessa asked, her voice was a little shaky but she tried to hide it.

"yeah, of course." brooke agreed, she seemed nervous too.

she got up from where she was sitting, and went with vanessa so they could talk. they were sat on some steps, which led to a more secluded part of the garden, which was quieter than where they had been moments before.

"i was going to come and find you." brooke said, before vanessa cut her off.

"what the fuck happened tonight?" vanessa started, her tone was harsh but she wasn't shouting. "plastique told me to come and ask you about what happened, so what the fuck happened?"

"what did she say?" brooke asked her.

"well i was trying to find where you were at, and i noticed that she seemed a little off and when i asked her about it she told me to come find you. i don't even know what to think right now, but it doesn't sound great, the way she was acting."

brooke didn't say anything for a moment or two, because in all honesty she could not believe what she was hearing. plastique was the one trying to make a move on her, she was the one saying nasty shit about vanessa, saying that brooke deserved better. she was the one who kept touching her and moving close to her, and now she was pretending that she was the innocent one in all of this.

brooke knew she hadn't done anything wrong, she had been cordial and polite up until the point where plastique called vanessa a slut, up until the point where she was holding onto brooke, getting a little too close to her. but she knew plastique was good at lying, at making things look a certain way and she knew how bad this must look to vanessa. she realised that now.

"vanessa i ... i swear to god nothing went down between me and plastique. i promise you." brooke's voice was shaking, she didn't want to lose vanessa over something that hadn't even happened.

"what happened then? talk to me." her voice was softer this time, more gentle.

and so brooke told her what happened. and vanessa listened. she trusted what brooke was saying, she knew that brooke wasn't the type of person to lie about something like this. she just knew.

"i'm so sorry, brooke. i'm such an idiot." vanessa sighed.

she knew now that she shouldn't have jumped to conclusions. but in her mind it just made so much sense; people had hurt her time and time again, what made brooke different? what was to say that she wouldn't hurt her just like everybody else?

"you're not, baby. and don't apologise either, you haven't done anything wrong." brooke told her.

vanessa just nodded.

"look at me, baby." brooke said, touching her chin, getting vanessa to look at her. "i love you."

"i love you too."

and if vanessa was sure of anything, it was that the love she had for brooke was way beyond her control now. even if brooke had cheated tonight, she would have still loved her. and maybe that was how she knew she was in too deep. she was a lost cause.

_** “and if you’ve never felt your soul being torn apart, you’ve never loved anyone with all your heart.” ** _


	17. part sixteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey everyone,
> 
> so this chapter is kinda a mess and i’m not really proud of it but i hadn’t posted in a lil while so i felt like i should post in regardless.
> 
> i’ve been feeling really weird recently, my heads all over the place and i just feel kinda down ?! i don’t know how to describe it. i’ve also been feeling really uninspired with this fic, so this might be the last chapter for a while, i’m just not feeling it right now.
> 
> however :) i have been thinking about writing a crystal x gigi fic, i’ve been thinking about this for a bit now so if anyone would like that let me know, i’ve been in the mood to try something different.
> 
> thank u for reading, i hope u enjoy this chapter, i might post again soon i might not but i’m not going to pressure myself if i don’t feel like it :)

the party went on. and despite the drama with plastique, brooke and vanessa were okay, more than okay really. they were making out, and dancing with one another, everything was good again, like nothing had even happened.

they left the party at around 1am, although in reality it was probably closer to 2am. they got a taxi back to vanessa's house, and when they finally arrived it took them a moment to actually get into the house. vanessa was struggling with the keys, and brooke was laughing into her side, causing vanessa to laugh too, making her hands shake as she attempted to get them inside.

when they eventually got into vanessa's house, they stumbled up into her bedroom. brooke plonked herself down on vanessa's bed, whilst the brunette kicked off her heels.

"vanessa, you're so fucking pretty, have i ever told you that?" brooke said, and it became very obvious to vanessa that she had had a little bit too much to drink because of the way that she was slurring her words.

"maybe once or twice, babe." vanessa smirked, as she made her way over to her girlfriend.

brooke's hands grabbed vanessa's hips, as she pulled her body closer. she looked up at the girl in front of her, a big, sappy smile on her face as she took in her how gorgeous her girlfriend looked.

"you're so stunning, baby, it's not fair." brooke told her, before pouting. "like how is it fair that you look like that?"

vanessa smiled to herself, she couldn't believe how cute brooke was being, how adorable she looked as she spoke about her. vanessa pulled her in for a kiss, as she stood there in front of her, her hands resting on brooke's shoulders. when she pulled away, brooke was looking up at her like she was the most beautiful person on the planet, which brought butterflies to vanessa's stomach. she just felt so lucky.

"i love you, ness." brooke said, through a yawn.

"i love you too, baby." vanessa said in response. "we should get ready for bed, you look tired, love."

brooke all but nodded, humming in agreement. vanessa went over to her drawers, grabbing herself some clothes to sleep in, and whilst she was there, grabbed some for brooke too. she started to get undressed, noticing that brooke was checking her out, somewhat subtly.

"you checking me out again, boo?" vanessa teased, a stupid, smug look on her face.

"yes i am, you're fucking hot, what can i say?" drunk brooke didn't have a filter, vanessa was starting to realise.

vanessa giggled, making her way over to brooke when they were both finished getting changed. she pulled her into a hug, holding her there for a few moments, wanting her to stay close, to never let her go.

"i'm sorry about earlier, i shouldn't have jumped to conclusions." vanessa said, sincerely.

"it's okay, baby, honestly. i understand, truly. i know how it must have looked." brooke told her, and for a moment it was like she was sober, she wasn't slurring her words like she had been moments before.

vanessa wanted to go further, tell her that she was scared that things between them were about to go sour. she had been scared for a while now, scared that things were going to fall apart like they always did for her.

she didn't say a thing. instead she pulled brooke back in for another hug, and hoped that being in her arms would be enough.

and somehow, for a moment, it was.

///

brooke woke up, at around 11am the next day, her arms still wrapped around vanessa who was sleeping quietly beside her. her pink lips were pouted and her hands were clasped together, underneath her pillow. she looked adorable like this, peaceful too, like all was good in the world.

after a moment or two, before brooke's thoughts could begin to take over, vanessa began to stir. her eyes slowly flickered open, it took her a moment to adjust to the light that was currently beaming through the curtains, shining in on her and brooke. she mumbled a 'good morning', still clearly half asleep, before cuddling closer to brooke, wanting to feel the warmth from her body.

they stayed there for a while, cuddling in bed together, exhausted from the night before, slightly hungover from all the alcohol too. vanessa had an arm thrown around brooke's waist, their legs intertwined underneath the covers. brooke had her hand rested on vanessa's ass, holding on to it like she owned it, which got the brunette feeling a certain type of way to say the least. she wanted her.

"brooke." vanessa spoke out.

"yes, baby?"

"do you wanna fuck?" she asked, very directly, not knowing how else to say it.

"that was so direct, vanessa, oh my god." brooke told her, both shocked and turned on by how blunt she had been. 

vanessa had a smug look on her face, pleased with the way she had gotten brooke so flustered.

"so do you wanna?" she asked again with a smirk.

"of course, yeah." brooke replied, blushing a little, still clearly affected by the way vanessa had brought this all up.

vanessa brought her in for a kiss, her hands cupping her face whilst brooke held her hips. the two began making out, hands roaming each other's bodies as the kiss deepened. at some point, brooke flipped them over so that she was on top of the brunette, so that she was in control. she kissed down her neck, before taking off vanessa's pyjama shorts and her cotton panties in one go. she kissed down her stomach, appreciating every inch of her, wanting to show her some love just like always. her hands were placed on her spread thighs, and she was about to start making her girl feel good when vanessa's phone started ringing.

vanessa sighed, and felt around the bed, trying to find where her phone was. she found it pretty quickly, just before the incoming call timed out. it was alexis, her auntie - her mom's sister.

she and alexis were really close. she was there for vanessa a lot, more than her own parents were. she often checked in on her, making sure everything was okay with her and her mom. and vanessa really appreciated it, she really had no idea what she would do without alexis.

"vanessa, hi, i'm on my way over to your house, do you want anything from starbucks? i'm going to the drive thru." alexis said through the phone.

"what, right now?" vanessa asked her.

"uh ... yeah." alexis told her. "is that okay?"

"yeah it's fine, it's just ... brooke's here."

vanessa hoped she would take the hint and just drop by later, but somehow she didn't see that happening.

"ohhh, were y'all ..." but before she could finish that sentence vanessa cut her off.

"alexis! oh my god."

brooke giggled, she knew exactly what alexis must have said without even hearing it.

"what? i was just asking." alexis said in defense, laughing at how vanessa had reacted.

they talked on the phone for a moment or two longer, before vanessa told alexis that she had to go and that she'd see her whenever she got to her house, which would be in about half an hour.

vanessa pulled brooke in for a kiss, wanting to finish what they had started before alexis called. brooke ran her hands down vanessa's body, grabbing her hips before placing herself in between her legs, right where vanessa wanted her.

///

alexis arrived around twenty minutes later than anticipated, which meant they had more time to freshen themselves up after doing the dirty. when she arrived she pulled both girls into her embrace, she was like that, always wanting people to feel comfortable around her.

brooke had met alexis once before and from what she could tell she was a really nice, genuine person, possibly the only person that hadn't let vanessa down. she could see the strong bond that the two shared, how close they were, how they could share anything with one another. and it warmed brooke's heart, it made her feel better knowing vanessa had alexis in her life.

the three of them talked for about an hour or so, until brooke had to leave - her mom was wanting her home. vanessa drove her home, and assured her that alexis wasn't trying to scare her off or interrogate her or anything like that, that she in fact liked brooke a lot, which made brooke feel a lot more at ease.

she didn't care about what vanessa's mom thought of her, not really, she had met the woman maybe twice and both times she could tell that she really did not care about who was in her daughter's life. it annoyed brooke in a way, but she knew what vanessa's mom was like, how she just didn't care. and it was sad. vanessa deserved so much better. brooke did, however, care about what alexis thought of her. alexis was the only person in her family that vanessa felt safe with, that she felt loved by. and maybe that was the reason brooke cared about what she thought of her.

///

after dropping brooke off at her place, vanessa headed straight home. when she arrived she found that alexis was still there - she was waiting to see vanessa's mom, she wanted to talk to her since they hadn't spoke in a while. she was also wanting to spend more time with her niece, since they hadn't seen much of one another lately.

"so how's your mom doing?" alexis asked vanessa, as they sat there on the sofa.

"she's okay, i think, yeah. i don't see her that much, she's always working or doing god knows what." vanessa replied.

"does it bother you?" alexis asked, her tone was soft, she knew vanessa didn't like to talk about her feelings much so she didn't want to pressure her into talking if she didn't feel like it.

"a little, i guess. i'm alright though, i'm doing ... good for once, you know?"

"you seem happy with brooke." alexis observed.

"i am." vanessa told her.

"you love her, don't you?"

"i do, yeah."

there wasn't enough words in the english language to even begin to describe the way she felt about brooke. but to put it simply, yes she loved her.

"i can tell."

///

when brooke arrived home, her mom called her into the kitchen to talk.

"hey darling, how was the sleepover?" she asked.

brooke remembered how she had lied the day before, telling her mom that she was going to a 'sleepover', instead of just stating the truth. that's what she had to do though, she had done it countless times before and had never been found out, she didn't see the harm in it. she felt bad deep down but tried to push those guilty feelings away.

"it was good, yeah." brooke replied, keeping her answer short.

"was vanessa there?"

"yes she was, she just dropped me off actually. she would have come in but her auntie was waiting for her back at her place." brooke explained to her.

"you girls seem really close." her mother said after a moment or two.

brooke felt her chest tighten and her muscles tense up. she didn't want this to go where she thought it was going. she wasn't ready for everything to fall apart, not yet.

"yeah, we are." brooke said, her voice shaking.

"i see the way you two look at one another and i can't help but think that there's something more between you both." her voice was surprisingly calm, welcoming almost. "is vanessa your girlfriend, honey?"

brooke let out a deep breath, a sigh of relief almost. the look in her mother's eyes was something she had never seen before; not in a long time. it was a look of acceptance. and it warmed brooke's entire being.

"yes." she spoke out, her voice cracking slightly, like maybe she might cry because of the overwhelming amount of emotions she was feeling.

her mom held out her arms, pulling brooke into a warm, inviting hug. they stayed there for a moment, and brooke felt a different kind of peace. she had been struggling with this for a while now, the idea that she had let her parents down, that her liking girls, as well as guys, made them ashamed. that struggle didn't feel so heavy now, she felt a weight being lifted off her shoulders, like she could breathe again.

"i accept you, brooke. and i want you to know i love you so much, i really do. when you came out to me and your father ... i know i wasn't the most accepting, i was shocked and i just couldn't make any sense of it. i'm sorry, darling, i really am. i should have been supportive from the beginning. i know that now."

when brooke came out to them both, at the start of the year, her mom told her that she was confused, and that having feelings towards other girls was wrong, that it wasn't normal. her dad reacted similarly, he didn't speak to brooke for four days after she told them, and when he did finally talk to her again he said that she'd eventually get over this "phase". it was hurtful. and it affected her a lot. it consumed her for a while.

"i just want you to be happy, brooke, your happiness is the most important thing to me."she continued. "does vanessa make you happy?"

"yes she does." brooke told her.

"i'm glad." her mom smiled.

she gave brooke another hug, and the two spoke for a while. her mom told her that she was sorry, and brooke could tell that she was genuine. she asked about vanessa, she wanted to know more about her and their relationship. she could tell how much brooke adored vanessa, it was so clear now.

///

that night brooke lay in bed, on facetime to vanessa. she told her about her mom and everything that had went down. vanessa was so happy for her girl, she knew how worried brooke had been, that she had been scared incase they wouldn't accept their relationship. and sure, they still had brooke's dad to talk to but this was huge and it made brooke feel so much better about all of this.

she felt content. happy.

_**”you never thought you’d get this attached, did you?”** _


End file.
